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Originally Posted by the guy who be short
To what extent did Hobbits, Elves, Men & Dwarves even have love marriages? Love marriages only became common in the West in the 1700s. It seems sensible that parents had a role - look at Elrond guarding Arwen.
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It states in LaCE that the Eldar married for love or at least of free will and that the future spouses chose each other but the parents did have some say in the timing of the wedding.
However the evidence points to a far greater degree of familial influence if you look at Thingol and Elrond's conditions on their daughter's marriages and Curufin's words to Eol "those who steal the daughters of the Noldor and wed them without gift or leave do not gain kinship with their kin". The gift may refer simply to the "giving of a hand in marriage" but LaCE also says that the approval of the families is shown in the giving of a jewel to the new child-in-law and that though this was not essential to the validity of the marriage it was a grave insult to the families if these extra ceremonies were foregone other than in extreme circumstances. It also makes clear that Beren and Luthien could have married without Thingol's permission - it wouuld have been dishonourable not illegal.