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You quoted out of context because you are quoting sections of letters without the context (ie the letter which is being replied to)
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The context is obviously LotR; when Tolkien starts speculating about conditions which did not actually occur, he stated so and which they were in particular. So did I, when I said that Gollum's repentance might have equalled the ring's mastery if it were allowed to develop.
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Whatever Gollum told Gandalf is not to the point of what was going through his mind on the stairs.
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You are changing the subject, this was not what we were talking about. See previous posts. Anyway, regarding the stairs, I gave as many elements if possible. If you stick to your personal interpretation, in disregard of them, it is your choice.
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And what you fail to take into account is that Gollum is not sane & cannot be judged in the way a sane person would be judged.
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He had some issues; that is true. But he surived through every challenge, and maintained the idea of good and bad, although he didn't live up to it, and needed lies to appease himself. See previous posts, see the books.