The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum - View Single Post

Lalwendë · 10-26-2006, 06:05 AM

What do we want? We don't know! When do we want it? Um...who knows?

But no. What we want is now clear, we want to return to the Downs as was. Of course, we could all just shut up about davem and carry on as normal but there would then be a permanent undercurrent of resentment and suspicion, hence Downs Marred would be all we would have. One thing we clearly cannot do is to agree on who is right and who is wrong as all the evidence put forwards is subjective - from all sides. No amount of posts will get us over that barrier and we are only digging our trenches a little deeper each time as we simply do not understand one another.

So it is time to broker peace.

Of course I talk to davem about this on a daily basis (hourly, sometimes

). His one constant emotion is that of regret. He regrets that he may have unwittingly caused offence. He regrets that he chose to argue about this rather than just take a break or a step back. He regrets that this has caused distress to so many (and is surprised that so many people who he may have barely ever spoken to think so highly of him). He has said he is sorry about the whole thing.

We must remember we are not words on a screen we are all different people from different backgrounds, cultures and with different expectations and disputes will happen. We are not a homogenous mass.

We cannot have our old davem back, but we want the old Downs back. How are we going to get that? Of course as I said earlier we could just keep our traps shut about davem and this whole issue, but its clear that's not going to work; this would instantly create a two-tier Downs with a barely buried hatchet. We could move on and get onto other topics, but that would have the same effects as the above. We could split off from the Downs but that would be an obvious division. What is needed is a very real gesture of peace.

As I've said above, davem is filled with regret about what has happened. He loved the Downs and he loved the members too. He is sorry. If he was here now, he would not be posting as he is shaken and upset by all that's happened. But from chatting with other members it has become clear that in order to bury the hatchet the most effective solution now is simply to unban him as an effective gesture of peace.

This will tell the membership that forgiveness has taken place on both sides and in all sectors in between. It will tell the members that all considerations of pride and ego have now been put aside in favour of a more inclusive approach. davem has stepped down from his high horse and it is time all parties did the same. If we cannot find it in ourselves to provide a gesture of peace then it says a lot of terrible things about us, that we enjoy the thrill of power (or rebellion) more than friendship and comradeship, and we might as well all pack up and go back to our bunkers and hunker down.

So, who wants to smoke the pipe of peace? Hands up, now.

10-26-2006, 06:05 AM	#55
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,737	What do we want? We don't know! When do we want it? Um...who knows? But no. What we want is now clear, we want to return to the Downs as was. Of course, we could all just shut up about davem and carry on as normal but there would then be a permanent undercurrent of resentment and suspicion, hence Downs Marred would be all we would have. One thing we clearly cannot do is to agree on who is right and who is wrong as all the evidence put forwards is subjective - from all sides. No amount of posts will get us over that barrier and we are only digging our trenches a little deeper each time as we simply do not understand one another. So it is time to broker peace. Of course I talk to davem about this on a daily basis (hourly, sometimes ). His one constant emotion is that of regret. He regrets that he may have unwittingly caused offence. He regrets that he chose to argue about this rather than just take a break or a step back. He regrets that this has caused distress to so many (and is surprised that so many people who he may have barely ever spoken to think so highly of him). He has said he is sorry about the whole thing. We must remember we are not words on a screen we are all different people from different backgrounds, cultures and with different expectations and disputes will happen. We are not a homogenous mass. We cannot have our old davem back, but we want the old Downs back. How are we going to get that? Of course as I said earlier we could just keep our traps shut about davem and this whole issue, but its clear that's not going to work; this would instantly create a two-tier Downs with a barely buried hatchet. We could move on and get onto other topics, but that would have the same effects as the above. We could split off from the Downs but that would be an obvious division. What is needed is a very real gesture of peace. As I've said above, davem is filled with regret about what has happened. He loved the Downs and he loved the members too. He is sorry. If he was here now, he would not be posting as he is shaken and upset by all that's happened. But from chatting with other members it has become clear that in order to bury the hatchet the most effective solution now is simply to unban him as an effective gesture of peace. This will tell the membership that forgiveness has taken place on both sides and in all sectors in between. It will tell the members that all considerations of pride and ego have now been put aside in favour of a more inclusive approach. davem has stepped down from his high horse and it is time all parties did the same. If we cannot find it in ourselves to provide a gesture of peace then it says a lot of terrible things about us, that we enjoy the thrill of power (or rebellion) more than friendship and comradeship, and we might as well all pack up and go back to our bunkers and hunker down. So, who wants to smoke the pipe of peace? Hands up, now. __________________ Gordon's alive!