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I dont really refer to the books as lotr, because the lord of the rings is juust a part of the Ea created. I would refer to it as Ea or Arda, but few nonreaders understand that. I just think of it as Tolkiens works.
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I agree! It's impossible to say that you're a Arda-fan, or you'd like to play an Arda-quiz, because no one understands what are you talking about. But saying LotR or Middle-Earth isn't just the same thing.