Quote:
Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba
I wish Tom Bombadill spent more time in the Shire after the War of the Ring.
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Sure thing!
Tommy B opens up a health food store, which soon turns into the largest retail chain in all of Middle Earth. Soon his buying power brings all his suppliers to their knees and forces them to outsource most of their capital to "foreign" shores. This in turns lowers the prices at his stores but also lowers the standard of living for most of the inhabitants of Middle Earth. This importing greatly increases the wealth of the foreign nations, which in turn allow them to increase their national budgets on such necessities as "defense". In time these foreign nations grow jealous of Middle Earth and wage war upon it. By now, of course, all "great" warriors have either passed on or out of Middle Earth and Tom - as we know really isn't interested in such turmoil - is "powerless". Middle Earth is destroyed by the overzealous greed of those "executives" in charge by the very entities they were trying to eliminate.
I wish that when Gimli blew the horn of Helm Hammerhand, that the sound would have been the infamous BROWN note.