Unfortunatly, Smokey the Bear wouldnt' be lecturing in Gondor until the day after
or
Denethor: Now remember boys! For the history book: Me and Faramir single handedly killed all the orcs, and we killed Sauron (remember boys, that's a key one). But then, we were betrayed by Aragorn, and he burned our bodies! You got all that?
Guard: Uhh...
Denethor: Ok. It's not that hard. Can you give me a hand here? *guard walks over* *Denethor super glues the guard to the fire* The guard tripped! You all saw it
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'But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.'
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