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I can't claim credit for these, having seen them on another site...
"Safety Tip: Do not hold metal objects towards the sky during a thunderstorm."
"Alright, who's next in line to be knighted?"
(From councilofelrond.com)
Frodo: Ah, there's nothing like a good pipe full of weed, even if it's in the darkest depths of Mordor. Sam, do you have a light?
WK: Allow me.
(From me)
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door
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