Denethor: Hello, boys. I've been meaning to talk to you...
Faramir: Yes, father?
Denethor: Ah, well, I don't think it's best discussed in public...
Boromir: Oh, come on, pops. We're kind of on a schedule...still have to clean up the city after the battle...
Faramir: Yeah, time's at a premium. Just tell us now. How bad can it be?
Denethor: Well...alright. But remember that you made me tell you here!
Faramir: *sighs* Just spit it out, dad!
Denethor: Well, see, the truth is, boys...oh, jeez, this is embarassing! The truth is, boys, I'm not really your father.
Boromir: WHAT??
Faramir: You're kidding.
Denethor: 'Fraid not, son.
Boromir: Well, if you're not our father...who ARE you?
Denethor: Boromir...Faramir...I am your mother! (
)
Faramir: Oh, nee ta ma duh tyen-shia suo-yo duh run doh gai si!
(If anyone gets that last line, I will give you five pounds of Toblerone chocolate.)