That's a good topic, HI!
Indeed these smiles pose a bit of a problem: they are too restrictive (that coming from one, who, admitedly, has quite a weakness for smilies as diverse and funny as possible). But, I realize this is a serious forum and should live up to its reputation by not having an abundance of smilies and icons. The problem comes indeed when one is misunderstood in the use of smilies, and the entire message is therefore misunderstood.
BW argued that the meaning of the smilies is decided by the context, but more often it's quite the opposite way around. For instance, (hypothetical example) if I see a message that argues the importance of canonical-based fanfic, followed by the stick out tongue smiley, I'll obviously assume the person actually intended to say the opposite. But if I see it followed by the ambiguous smilie who rolls his eyes, I'm left not knowing what to assume: either that the person is mocking his/her own post, or that she/he rolls eyes at those who might think otherwise, or maybe that she/he is feeling very ****ed.
I've almost never used the sarcastic smiley, I much oftener settle for this one: : p, who (in my acception) means that I'm making light of the situation, and that what I said shouldn't be taken too seriously. This same meaning I attribute to this smiley here:
(regardless of how it looks like someone getting poked in the eye
). Speaking of : D , for me it has a clear message of being very amused, laughing, or making a joke. While this one:
may indicate a more moderate level of amusement, but I always use it as a sign of approval (towards a post, a point of view), or friendliness, to atenuate what might be taken as a harsh remark, or just to accompany the routine of the quiz room's overused phrases like 'correct', 'your turn' etc.
So, what's to be done?
Remove labels is a suggestion, but I must confess that I didn't pay too much attention to these labels; I do let the context spell it out for me, but most of the times I seem to reach a wrong conclusion as to the nature of the message, the person's disposition, and so may other people when reading my 'smilied' posts.