[dancing spawn of ungoliant]

What a market hole there would have been for a radar during the War of the Ring! Very handy when spotting flying Nazguls (or Nazguli...).

Hey, a random mental picture: what if LotR was a Disney animation. At the Pelennor fields orcs are gathering and Gondorians are marching out of the city. All draw out their swords and - - burst into a song! "Heeyy, we are scary orcs and we want to conquer yor little cityyyy...tralalalalaaaah."
Or better yet, a slum musical. There are East Side (Mordor) vs. West Side (the rest). And there is a big gang fight about the one BlingBling that rules them all...