That's just it-it's a fantasy world, and I'd want to be a part of it. I can leave behind me almost everything. I'm connected to only two people in this world, both of them feeling the way I do. None of us are rooted to Earth. My family disowned me for not being able to prevent a death I wasn't even there for, my boyfriend's family disowned him because his brother landed in jail while living with his mom-my boyfriend's ex-stepmom. And his daughter is so young. TVs and computers and modern things matter nothing to us. A great escape is to go to the woods to get away from everything. Go camping, hunt our own food. The only thing we would need is matches since I never got down the hang of starting fire without matches. It's hard, but relaxing, and I once did it for 5 weeks. Pitched a simple tent so I could see the stars, dug a latrine many yards away, made a cooking area, prayed no wild animal would eat me while I slept (that's how deep woods I go-there are bears and mountain lions). It was hard work, but relaxing. And really, I missed nothing about home. To go jump naked (or nearly) into a cold stream after a hot day is such a thrill, and to sing while walking among the trees. To appreciate the beauty in such simple things as the veins of a leaf without people calling me weird and mental is such a rarity I only experience in nature. It's liberation that can only be felt when I disconnect myself even more than usual from what's around me.
I could so easily walk away from my life here that it's almost frightening. I could be a butterfly and just set off, leaving behind me all the meaningless things I own. All that matters to me is the one I love, and the little one I love. If my family doesn't want me, I don't care to be around them either. Would I miss the stapler on my desk? No. Would I miss the ocean? They have waters in ME.
Seriously I have thought about putting together a retreat for a week for people who want to go live for seven days in Middle Earth on Earth. In character, costume, everything. An escape. I've got most of it planned out and written, just not the location. We may invest in some property, a parcel that's 360 acres and untouched, that would be perfect to set up like ME for a place to retreat once a year or more with other people who want to get away. It sounds crazy, but so is regular life, and it's so mice to dream about getting away from everything, or even to plan the day I can make it happen. I wouldn't think twice about going left.
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