[harlindon]

Ok ok ok these are all very funny but, me favorites, well they aren't really quotes. They are off of the subtitles from boot leg copies. Aka illegal copies. ok here are just some of them, i swear i fall over laughing when ever i read these! HAHAHAHAHA<P><BR>Gandalf about Sauron: "His poisonous gases are spreading through Middle-Earth, taking shape..." <P><BR>Gimli to Legolas, entering Moria: "In Moria we will feast on tasty fruit stones: my nephew is very generous!" <P>Gandalf to Frodo: "I simply gave your uncle a nasty kick in the butt!" (From: "All I did was give your uncle a little nudge out of the door".) <P>Merry and Pippin in Maggots' fields: "We are just picking up discarded food" <BR>Maggot shouting after them: "Get the **** out of my field, you half-sized ****! Just let me get you, I'll tear your ears off!" <P>Saruman to Gandalf: "Tell me friend, who and when has smashed your brains out?" (From: "The love to the Shire leaf has clearly slowed your mind"). <P>Bilbo to Gandalf: "This pain is filling me and leaking out, like butter which was placed too thick on a piece of bread (From: "I feel thin --sort of stretched like butter scraped over too much bread") <P><BR>Galadriel while tempted by the Ring: "SHOW ME YOUR LOVE AND DEVOTION!" <P>Sam to Gandalf: "Please don't turn me into a thing!" <P>Galadriel (Starting from: "I amar prestar aen…"): Yummy pestle… <P>The world is crooked. <BR>I soak it up with the water, <BR>I see it in the eyes, <BR>I inhale it with the air. <P>And none, who now lives, remembers anything at all… <P>A bit of the Ring's History <P>Galadriel: "The Ring had come to the hands of creature Golom, who took it to the depth of the magic mountain, and there he was burning with mad lust". <BR>"The Ring didn't live up to expectations of the most powerful rulers. It left Golom. But everybody still had no idea. The Ring came to a man as unlucky as you can only imagine. It came to a hobbit - Bilba Baggins from the village named Shire." <P>Bilbo smoking with Gandalf: "What can be better than getting stoned with your old friend?" <P>Bilbo's speech: My dear Tooks, Brendybucks and errr… [pause] errrr… other respectable families. <P>Bilbo: "I'm old, Gandalf, even if I don't look old. But I begin to feel it with one of my parts. I feel pain, kinda. I feel the oily touch of this pain, which is scratching". (From: "I feel thin - sort of stretched like butter scraped over too much bread") <P>Bilbo's parting advices to Frodo: <P>Bilbo's voiceover advice to travellers (seems to be heartfelt): "If you aren't steady on your legs, something can knock you off and drag away … <P>Bilbo about Sting: "It was forged by Elves… Not far from cannibals. Its blade changes its color to blue. And at moments like that you have to be extra careful." <P>Aragorn throwing Frodo into a room in "Pony": "What the **** are you doing, Mr.Underhill?" <P>Sam meets Aragorn, three different versions: <P>Version 1: <BR>Sam: "Let him go or I will kill you!" <BR>Aragorn: "I'm sure you will. I don't doubt it." <P>Version 2: <BR>Sam to Aragorn in "Pony": "Are you crazy?!" <BR>Aragorn: "You have such a good heart." <P>Version 3: <BR>Sam to Aragorn in "Pony": "You're a dead man!" <BR>Aragorn: "Screw you, shortie". <P>Merry after first seeing Arwen: "Who's that chick?" <P>Saruman about Gandalf: "You are afraid to go into the Mines. Dwarves had crawled into very bowels of the mountain. You know that their shadows and sparks of fire can still be seen in the darkness of Kazad-Dun." <P>Gimli: "You will soon feel the questionable hospitality of the Dwarves." <P>Eccentric Galadriel <P>Galadriel welcoming Fellowship (From: "He has fallen into shadow. .The quest stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little and it will fail to the ruin of all…. Welcome Frodo of the Shire. One who has seen the Eye!") <P>Version 1: <BR>Galadriel: "You have come to the Land of Shadow". <P>Version 2: <BR>Galadriel: "He went to the kingdom of shadows, but adventure continues! Make one wrong step and you will be lost in this world forever. Welcome Frodo. LOOK INTO MY EYES, FRODO!" <P>Boromir to Aragorn (after this greeting): "I'm so sick of this idiot woman, her voice is banging on my brains since we've come to this darned forest." <P>Yeah ok thats enough sorry people i got a little carries away with that. Its just so easy to cut and paste! Oh and I do not have a boot leg copy of this (my friend does thought bad her) i found this on a web site, how i found these i dont know but they are soooooooooo funny!!!!!! : <P>