Whatevery path Merisuwyniel had decided, Pettygast could make neither head nor tail of it. It all looked the same to the wizard. The subway car continued hurtling through the bowels of darkness, roaring and clanging like a great dragon of the night. Pettygast found himself crammed into one midget-sized corner of the compartment, wedged in between three super-sized heroes who were inexcusably taking up all the space, and making no bones about their right to do so.
The wizard grumbled something unintelligible from beneath his breath, and reflected that this iron beast seemed a most unpleasant way to travel. Moreover, the thing too closely resembled those mechanical monstors that had been described in great detail within the early drafts of the fall of Gondolin, but which had then been rejected by authorities as standing clearly ouside canon. Since Pettygast had no wish to stand on canon, either inside or out, he sincerely hoped this entire trip would end soon.
His donkey had been luckier than most, and was actually able to squat down on his rear in one of the few empty seats, which had recently been vacated by a suspicious-looking Troll. This passenger had thoughtfully left his daily tabloid behind, somewhat crumpled and smelling of fried fish, but still eminently readable. Hummus was now intently perusing the latest edition of the "Mordor Daily News"
Suddenly, the donkey reared up from his seat and began hee-hawing loudly into the air, begging his master Pettygast to come quick and have a look.
"Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw!" The donkey's braying rang insistently through the car.
Vogonwe covered his ears and glared back at Pettygast, sticking out his tongue, "Now, who's making the noise, old pinktoes? Can't you control your beast?"
Hummus lifted up his hoof and banged on the nearest pole to silence everyone in the compartment. Then he pointed triumphantly to a small notice that appeared on the very bottom of page 32 of the pictorial section within the Sunday Supplement.
This advert read as follows:
Quote:
Notice of the Fraternal Order of Balfrogs
You are hereby invited to join us for a rumble sale that will take place this coming Wednesday at 2:00 p.m. in the vicinity of the underground station at Golder's Green. Among the treasures offered for your consideration are several cheap replicas of the One Ring, complete with broken chain; a used suit of mithril with several holes poked in the side, reputedly the former possession of Messieurs Frodo and Bilbo who have since departed for greener shores; and, of particular note, several chairs and tables which are said to be crafted from the wood of an Ent.
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"By Jove," muttered Lord Etceteron. "That could be a find. I have long wanted a used suit of mithril."
Pettygast glared pointedly towards Lord Etceteron to shush him up and then, without warning, leapt forward in mid-air and, executing a double somersault of his own with surprising ease, yanked down on a cord that had red letters beside it spelling out the word "Emergency". The iron beast on which they were riding abruptly halted with a great grinding noise. Through the windows the fellow-gal-ship could clearly see a sign labelled "Golder's Green."
All about were cloaked figures with pointed teeth and horns who all carried whips and thongs. They were all scurrying down a long alley way which had a hand scrawled note beside it that read, "This way to the Rumble Sale." Orogorn II craned his neck out the open door to see whether the Balfrogs did or didn't...., but as they were all wearing voluminous cloaks, it was impossible to say for sure.
Pettygast authoritativly grabbed up his pink staff in one hand and his donkey in the other and charged out onto the station platform to the astonishment of the assembled throng of balfrogs. Realizing that a diversion was definitely called for, he grabbed hold of a nearby loudspeaker and announced at the top of his lungs, "If anyone wants to have a go at the greatest heroes in the universe, just follow that train right there, now departing from platform #5."
Then, as all the balfrogs began racing in the opposite direction, Pettygast sauntered forward towards the rumble sale. Just as the doors to the train were about to slam shut, he turned around to shout encouragement to his former companions, "Fly, you fools!" and was instantly gone.
[ January 28, 2003: Message edited by: Child of the 7th Age ]