slang LOTR
i was thinking, as theres people here from all over the world, we could make lotr in hundreds of different styles!
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this is Caradhras (abridged and paraphrased) in Eastenders style:
"I reckon that Sauron'll be keepin' an eye (get it? an eye!) on the Red'orn Gate. We better get goin', soon as. Orright?" said Gandalf"
"Yeah 'K then mate. But I'll tell yer somefin' for nofin'- I've been 'round this gaff before an' it's gonna be brass monkeys up there, Gazza me old china. We oughta take some've that wood, innit. Won't do no good if we're secret but brown bread, will it?" said Boromir.
"Yeah, yeah. But we don't use 'less we 'ave ta, right"
The geezers went up the bloody 'uge mountain, right, an' it got more an' more parky, yeah, wiv the wind 'owlin' an all. And then it even started snowin' innit.
"Blinkin' 'eck Mr Frodo guv" went Sam "I don't reckon much to this. I wish this snow'd just get goin' up 'Obbiton way, innit. They might like it up there."
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“Sylphs of the forest,” I whispered. “Spirits of oak, beech and ash. Dryads of Rowan and hazel, hear us. You who have guided and guarded our every footstep, you who have sheltered our growth, we honour you."
the Forbidden Link
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