[Child of the 7th Age]

Rosa--Glad you are back. Yes, absolutely, fantasy books have helped me get through some of the most challenging moments in my life. The two books that have had the most influence on me are Lord of the Rings and TH White's The Once and Future King (also one of those books where you can feel joy and sorrow all wrapped up in one!)

Two particular times in my life stand out. When I first read the books in adolescence, way back in the mid 60s, I thought I was a very strange child indeed. I was very much into literature and history and academics. This was a bit unusual, since my family lived in a working class area of Detroit, and these interests stuck out a bit, shall we say! Plus, way back then, teachers looked at girls in different ways than they looked at boys. I will never forget a world history teacher telling me that it was a pity I wasn't a boy since I had such a fine mind (Growl!). Anyways, reading Tolkien and White gave me the confidence to stick out my tongue and tell them I didn't care if I was different. If there could be a world with hobits and elves and poetry which seemed so marvelous, I didn't have to be limited to my own neighborhood and ways of thinking. In fact, I decided I liked being different, and they could all go jump in a lake. I fell in love with medieval history and even went on to get a doctorate in the field.

The second time was much sadder. My husand and I lost our oldest daughter to SIDS, or crib death, when she was 7 months old. This was truly the most horrific experience of my life. We went through a year of serious, serious grieving. Many things helped me get through that year but, among them, was my gut rock belief in Tolkien and fantasy. I really identified with Frodo's plight, having something so horrendous thrust on him with little choice, as well as the sorrow and grief he went through after his "lapse" at Mount Doom. You know I think that, even though Tolkien was quite young when his mother died, he must have remembered some of his emotional response to that immediate loss as well as the grief of ensuing years with no parents, and being shunted from place to place. (He and his wife Edith both faced a similar dilemma and were drawn together by it.) I say this because Tolkien's portrayal of Frodo after the quest up to his departure for Grey Havens was very much that of someone in profound grief. The ups and downs, the problems confronting him on the anniversares of various milestones, being so tired that you simply withdraw from everyday life--these were all very familiar to me. So I am thankful for all the suppport of friends and family through that awful year, but also the writings of a man I never met who taught me that, even in the worst of times, you can go on and, like Frodo, make sacrifices and come out in the end with a more perceptive heart. sharon, the 7th age hobbit [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]

[ April 24, 2002: Message edited by: Child of the 7th Age ]