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Squatter, I think it really IS the One Ring... at least I hope so.
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Actually, I think it's Mr. Bush's wedding ring; or at least I hope so. I dread to think what he'd do with that sort of power.
Verb sap: perhaps it would be a good idea to drop these amusing allegories, lest someone compare Osaruman with Emmanuel Goldstein and open a real can of worms.