The Balrog Debate
Khazad-dûm is falling down, falling down, falling down
Khazad-dûm is falling down,
There goes Gandalf.
Crack the whip and spread your wings, spread your wings, spread your wings,
Crack the whip and spread your wings,
There goes Gandalf.
Silly twit, there are no wings, are no wings, are no wings,
Silly twit, there are no wings,
Those are merely shadows.
Read the book, you brainless moron, brainless moron, brainless moron,
Read the book you brainless moron,
It’s there in black and white.
Ever hear of metaphor, metaphor, metaphor?
Ever hear of metaphor?
Look it up in the HoME.
Metaphor? You HoME-ie snob, HoME-ie snob, HoME-ie snob,
Metaphor? HoME-ie snob,
Ever hear of re-writes?
HoME-ie snob? You illiterate wanker! illiterate wanker! illiterate wanker!
HoME-ie snob? You illiterate wanker!
Go read Roverandom!
Roverandom this, you pretentious as*****...
“Aunt Birdie, this is boring! Can’t we just sing the song and have fun?”
“Why certainly, dear. Big finish?“
“YEAH!”
“KHAZAD-DÛM IS FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN,
KHAZAD-DÛM IS FALLING DOWN,
THERE GOES GANDALF!”
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