Okay, so Boromir and some troublemalers immediately set up an illegal smoking area at the far end of the furthest field and bully the younger humans into keeping lookout for them.
Legolas sets up a beauty parlour as an alternative for those who don't want to do compulsory sports. Which is everyone.
Sam takes up residence in the kitchens and makes everyone eat regular, healthy meals and terrorises anorexics.
Merry and Pippin establish an illegal alcohol trade.
Gandalf is the strict councillor who insists on keeping to the lights-out rules and terrorises anyone who breaks them.
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age?
2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.
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