Still on my British kick... From "How to Irritate People", by John Cleese et al. Again, apologies for blatant adlibbing in my quotes:
scene: at Helm's Deep. A line of 3 elven soldiers are standing behind a single Rohirrim at the wall.
John Cleese (voiceover): Here, we have a legitimiate Rohirrim soldier. Observe the Pepperpots in action.
Elf 1: Oooh!
Elf 2: Aaah!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (together): tch tch tch!
Elf 1: Oooh!
Elf 2: Aaah!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (together): tch tch tch!
Rohirrim soldier looks back at elves, irritated.
JC: One of the major strategies of pepperpots is to delight in pointing out the obvious.
Elf 1: The orcs have arrows!
Elf 2: That one's aiming his bow!
Elf 3: He's shot the arrow!
Elves (together): He's shot the arrow! He's shot the arrow!
Arrow narrowly misses Aragorn
Elf 1: Did you see that?
Elf 2: It just missed Aragorn!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (together) It just missed Aragorn!
RS glares at them, making a shushing motion
Elf 1: Oooh!
Elf 2: Aaah!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (glaring at RS): tch tch tch!
JC: Pepperpots also tend to laugh inappropriately.
Elf 1: Gimli is short!
They all laugh loudly
RS looks like he's about to jump off battlement in frustration
JC: Observe now their response to the legitimate laughter of the legitimate soldier.
The hyena lemmings appear in all their hilarity, being driven by Boromir (back from the dead) doing his funky disco moves, flanked by downsters doing the wave
Rohirrim soldier lets out a small chuckle
Elf 1: Sssh!
Elf 2: Sssh!
Elf 3: Sssh!
(Turns out the Legitimate Rohirrim Soldier was none other than Hama, and one of his many deaths was caused by the insanity which was induced by the elves...)
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"Do you think I am trying to weave a spell? Perhaps I am; but remember your fairy tales. Spells are used for breaking enchantments as well as inducing them. And you and I have need of the strongest spell that can be found to wake us from the evil enchantment of worldliness..." - C.S. Lewis
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