Heres one I thought up on a 5 hour drive yesterday.
Gandalf: You cannot Pass!
Balrog: Why not?
Gandalf: Because...um, er ah......Because you didn't answer my riddle!
Balrog: Ok, shoot.
Gandalf: Why did the Balrog cross the Bridge?
Balrog: to totally incinerate the fellowship, steal the ring and get a cup of shugar.
Gandalf: Gasp! How did you know?
Balrog: just a guess, now may I please pass?
Gandalf: I am a sevant of the secret fire, wielder of the flame of Arnor, the dark fire will not avail you flame of Undun!
Balrog: what does that have to do with letting me pass?
Gandalf: Beats me it was in the script.
*Balrog getting annoyed*
Balrog: Give me a break.
Gandalf: Ok.
*Gandalf breaks bridge and Balrrog falls, but gets Gandalf with his whip.*
Gandalf: Aragorn! Legolas! Come over here and help!
Legolas and Aragorn: Can't.
Gandalf: WHAT???? Why not?
Aragorn: Cause it says on page, 372 that you fall.
*Aragorn walks over and kicks Gandalf off ledge and Gandalf falls.*
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Instead of pepper spray, you pack a glass bottle and scream "Aiya Earendil Elenion Ancalima!!!" at muggers.
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