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-   -   I'd like your Opinion on something. (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=3494)

Elfchick 06-28-2002 01:38 PM

I'd like your Opinion on something.
 
This song... I wrote it after I finished Reading ROTK For the first time. Its pretty silly I think, and the punctuation is pretty bad, but Anyways Here It is:

oh what will become of the Mallorn tree
that grows by the flowing stream
oh what will become of the Mallorn tree
now that the elves have gone


Will it wilt and fade away
will it grown and stay
Oh what will become of the Mallorn
tree
now the the elves have gone


And what will become of the great
green valleys
The rivers flowing strong,
Oh what will become of the tallest
mountains
now that the elves have gone.


What will Become of all the people,
in kingdoms great and small
Oh what will become of all the people
now that the elves have gone.


Oh What will become of the Mallorn tree
Now that the elves have gone
who will care for the mighty forests
and the ones newly grown


Oh what will become of the middle earth
When no Elves remain
Will all of its beauty, like a river
drain
Or will what is there still remain

Starbreeze 06-28-2002 01:45 PM

*wipes away a tear* Oh wow, thats really good. It so sad, I feel tears coming...wow! Got any more?

Ithaeliel 06-28-2002 01:46 PM

That's beautiful, Elfchick!!!! I love it!

Raefindel 06-28-2002 01:54 PM

That was really beautiful. You are a talented writer, Elfchick! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

piosenniel 06-28-2002 01:58 PM

Very wistful! Have you others?

Anunia 06-28-2002 02:02 PM

The song is great!! You should write more of them!!

mystra 06-28-2002 02:48 PM

thats really nice!!!!! write some more! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

gollum*elf*pup 06-28-2002 03:06 PM

wow, that was amazing, elfchick! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Susan Delgado 06-28-2002 05:07 PM

That's wonderful...have you put it to music?

ArwenBaggins 06-28-2002 05:17 PM

I love it ElfChick!

Alkanoonion 06-28-2002 06:55 PM

Thank you Elfchick.
That was really beautiful. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Laredith 06-28-2002 07:08 PM

Oh wow! That was great (a lot better than my stuff, I assure you)! Do you have more? Or is that it? Because, of course, it would be nice if there were some more.

QuickSlash 06-28-2002 07:27 PM

Great job on that poem. You should try writing about more books. ^_^ Your work is in demand now, so it wouldn't hurt to try. Good luck with it all.

Elfchick 06-28-2002 08:23 PM

lol well I have more stuff, but not about LOTR really, I don't spend much time on Songs or poems. I write stories more. Not fan fic either. But yes I think I have a couple more laying around.

Do you really think its anygood?

Ithaeliel 06-28-2002 08:41 PM

To be perfectly honest...

yes. It it so sad. And to be truly sad, it has to be good.

What kind of stories do you write?

NyteSky 06-28-2002 09:24 PM

That's beautiful. I'd love to see more of your writings, do you have a website or anything? Goodluck with your writings. (tho you seem not to need it) [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

NyteSky

NazgulNumber10 06-28-2002 09:34 PM

beutiful. simple and lovely. thats a real tear-gerker, and thats why i love it.
[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] (see I have a lighter side too)

Shadow of Udûn 06-29-2002 04:51 AM

I really like that!
One of the most powerful emotions through LOTR is the sense of sadness at the passing of the elves. I think that song expressed it pretty well. [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

Morquesse 06-29-2002 11:42 AM

Of course I think it's really good! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] I also think you should do some more, or post any others that you have done.
Keep on writing girl, you've got some talent there.
~M
P.S. Greetings and solutions, Shadow of Udûn! Welcome to the downs! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

[ June 29, 2002: Message edited by: Morquesse ]

Elfchick 07-02-2002 12:20 PM

hm... Thank you.

Lets see to answer Ithaeliel's questing. I Write fantasy. Yes thats right. Of course i do mystry and stuff sometimes but mostly fantasy.
right now, I'm working on one about a prince and princess of the kingdom of Shankland (I suck and making up names) And they both run away. The princess goes west towards the dark forest and the kingdome of Legends with a knight and a peasant. The Prince goes East towards waterlands. (another kingdom) Anyways, Right away The prince is shot, he doesn't die but he is badly wounded and he is takin to Waterlands palace to be healed.
Meanwhile the Knight who is travelling with the princess is Killed. [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]
The Princess and the peasant flee into the dark forest. Get lost. Meet these twelve mysterious guys. They go to this bridge held against the dark forest. (which is always growing and even took over a kingdom) Anyways The bridge is held by the soldiers of shankland and Legends who have a special alliance. anyways, the Legends soldiers attack and burn the bridge. Betrayal! Oh my what a surprize!
Meanwhile the Prince goes to see if he can get the dwarves to join the fight against Trandell (no one knows yet that legends is involved) he and his companions (the prince and princess of the waterlands) meet the king of Trandells sister. She agree's to help them. they continue across the greater barrins to the dwarves land, meet a little goblin dude who helps them. travel into the ring of flame. Meet a girl with 26 wolves who comes from the kingdom overtaken by the dark forest so long ago. She goes with them.
MEANWHIlE the princess is on her way up dragon peaks. (won't release to much about that now) once they get to the top they ride to dragon Island on what? Dragons! oh come on you can't say you didn't know! anyways. The Princess finds out her mother was the queen of these lost people, and she is the heir. but there are evil people from other islands (haven't got that part worked out yet) who ride dragons to and have Allied with Trandell (how Ironic) ANyways, In the end there will be a big fight, People will die, dragons will die. Lots of other scary stuff will happen. Trandell will be taken over by the kings sister. And I'm not giving the rest of the ending away!

Oh and there are these four black horses. THEY RULE.
SO what do you think?

PS. the names of the places can still be changed, and I'd like a little help with thinking up names for places if someone wants to help. Oh and I need a title.

Elfchick 07-02-2002 12:24 PM

Oh now you got me started. Here is another poem I wrote. Its not as good as the other. I wrote it when I should have been working on science. ITs not sad like the other just some little thing I scribbled. Its really not to good.

Sword of darkness
Long and light
Forged for stongness
In the night

You can weild it
If you dare
but be warned,
For darkness is there.


Sword of light
Short yet bright
with a true hearted weilder
Will win the fight

If you are weak
It be to
Reflecting your heart
showing it to you

Sheild of night
Shinning bright
With diamonds light
Blocking blows left and right

Easy to use in a fight
Tempting apponents into sight
Blocking blows and killing the right
In you.

Sheild of light
Dull not bright
using your heart
to win the fight

Its hard to bear
For only the true
can weild its light
Using their hearts
Winning the fight


Darkness strong
Fighting for you
until it clashes with the true
then in the blink of an eye
it abandons you.

Which do you use?

Ithaeliel 07-02-2002 05:34 PM

http://216.40.249.192/mysmilies/contrib/ed/cry.gif Augh! It's so... wonderful! *SOB* It's so sad!

And the story sounds great! U should get it published!

Nimrodel 07-03-2002 10:11 AM

It's very sad and Haunting, Elfchick. You did a good job. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Arwen Imladris 07-03-2002 09:08 PM

Oh my! Elfchick, these are great! More More! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

gee, I wish I could write like that! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

NyteSky 07-03-2002 09:49 PM

[img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] Sounds great! (Fantasy's the best of course, and dragons improve anything) Could I read it sometime? Free editing services. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] (I have very bad grammer and my spelling's not much better but other than that I'm really good at it!) [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] Names I can do tho. Lots of names. Just ask if you ever need any.
Great second poem too. I think I'd go with the swords, (one in each hand, best way to go) I've never cared much for shields. How far have you gotten in your book? Sounds like you have it well planned out at least, got me beat. Have fun writing!

Calencoire 07-04-2002 08:42 PM

Hey, thats really cool.


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