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Titles rejected by Frodo, Bilbo and others.
Well, the game is simple and a little silly.
We know that Bilbo went though several titles for his story, so I thought it would be fun to suggest alternate titles for The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit and any other Tolkien work. Sound good? Then let's go... The Lord of the Rings could have been called... - Quest Good. - The Hobbit 2: The revenge of the killer Hobbit - Honey, I lost the Ring. - Sauron's Strange Silliness. - Rings an' stuff. The Silmarillion could have been called... - The Book of shiny things that get stole. - Book - Honey, I stole the Silmarils The Children of Hurin could have been called... - Honey, I lost the kids. - Bad stuff in 3D - Honey, I killed the kids - Melkor's Malevolent Movements |
Great thread, Hookbill!
The Lord of the Rings could have been in separate books as it is:
Book One - How I Met the Riders Book Two - Two Deaths... Book Three - ...and One Funeral Book Four - The Two Hobbits' Tale Book Five - It Was on Fire When I Lay Down On It Book Six - same as above. The Silmarillion could have been called: - All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten The Akallabëth could have been called: - The Old Man and the Sea The Children of Hurin could have been called one of these: - The Old Man and the See - Beleriand 90210 |
LOTR -"We didn't mean to go to Mordor"
Hobbit "Bilbo Baggins and the Wizard's Quest" |
Random Title #218
Lord of the Rings:
~Frodo and Sam's Excellent (and Dangerous) Adventure ~A Bunch of People Go Places, and Some of Them Return! ~101 Ways to Injure a Ringbearer ~Why Sauron Sold his Practice The Hobbit: ~My Story ~Why Dragons Aren't that Scary ~How Many Dwarves Does it Take to Get Rid of a Dragon? (Answer on Page 335) |
The Silmarillion:
- The Valla from Hell - Harry Potter And The Magical Demon - I Can't believe it's not Lord of the Rings - Police, Camera, Elves - Carry On Melkor - I love the First Age |
The "Fog on the Barrow-Downs" chapter was almost re-named "Frodo Baggins and the Deathly Hallows" :eek:
Or a nice idea for the Silmarillion: Elves are from Venus, Men are from Mars Maybe in a Narnia-style for LotR: The eagle, the Witch-king and the Ring |
For LotR:
92 Days Later Around Middle-earth in 92 Days Bridge of the Khazadum The Doom Busters Orodruin Ho! Boldfinger For The Tale of Aragorn and Arwen: Aragorn, Gondor Ranger For TH: Blister Fly, Dragon! East of Arda Surprised by Smaug The Gold and the Dutiful for CoH: Turn, Turn, Turn |
LotR:
Mr. Baggins or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Ring. Smeagol's Amazing Fishing Adventures. |
The Lord of the Rings:
- What we did on holiday - Rings and Things - Kings and Rings - The Rings that sings - Big Book of Stuff what happened... Children of Hurin - Christopher Tolkien Likes your money - One o' them stories - Bad luck old chap... |
Other ideas...
As when everything is going to be renamed except for the Hobbit, we'd read the titles as follows (in order of the Hobbit, LotR, New Shadow, Silmarillion, CoH)
The Hobbit The Hobbits (with the subtitle "This Time, It's War!") The Hobbit 3 The Hobbit -1 The Hobbit without the Hobbits |
We should have caught the Bus to Rivendell.
The first few chapters of LotRs could be called:
Stains, Pains and Autumnhobbles. . |
Lord of the Rings:
"To Hell and Back" |
Before settling on 'The New Shadow' Tolkien tried...
- Not Lord of the Rings - Let's make up and be Friendly - The Old bad - The New Car - The New House - The New Hobbit? - The News. - The News at ten - The New Barrow |
Discards from the deck
More pencilled out titles:
Ringworm Ringworld (adopted ages later to great acclaim by Larry Niven) The Eagle Has Landed (optioned ages later by Jack Higgens) The Four Little Hobbits and How They Grew (amended in a later age by Margaret Sidney) Wiz Kids (still up for grabs) A Ring for the Old Gollem (revisited in late Renaissance England) Blowed Up Good (tagline taken by SCTV in late Seventh Age) Magic: The Gathering (assumed by a Seventh Age tournament and convention company) |
The Lord of the Rings:
- The Ring and it's friends - Hobbits on the run - Sauron's happy time goods - The Return of the bads - Gandalf's hat goes on an adventure. Also there is a ring involved. - Mystical adventure about Rings and Lords and wars and all the stuff that was good in The Hobbit but bigger and better and this is a long title. - :smokin: - A Hobbit, A Ring and a Whole world of trouble! - Not the Three o'clock News. |
Rejected titles....
For The Lord of the Rings: "The Ring and I" "Frodo Vs. the Volcano" For The Hobbit: "Bilbo's Thirteen" "Dragon Tale" For The Silmarillion: "Dude, Where's my Jewel?" |
Ok, here goes...
For The Hobbit: Bard The Bowman, or how i came to stop worrying and shoot a dragon. How Smaug was horribly murdered. Gollums' tale (with what happened before and after) For The Lord Of The Rings: Gollums tale 2: On the trail of the Bagginses. Dungeons and Balrogs. (oh no i di'nt) Tom Clancy's Ranger Force :eek: |
For LotR:
Live Free or Die Hard No Lunch Today For The Silmarillion: Terraforming Middle-earth For TH: Roll out the Barrels |
Hmmm...let's see now.
Sam's suggestion Ring Around the Rosie was immediately rejected. The Gaffer's All's Well as Ends Better was thought to be a bit too anti-climactic. Aragorn's A Tree Grows on Mindolluin was considered too sentimental. Treebeard's Forest Stump was cut down rather quickly. Saruman's offering Get Shorty was denied as rude. Elrond's Mr. Smith goes to Rivendell was considered too anachronistic. And an apologetic Lobelia Sackville-Baggins offered Taming of the Shrew, but it was too topical. |
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Here we have: The Lord of the Rings... Gandalf's Freakish eyebrows 2 Saruman's technicolour dream coat How a Hobbit upstaged the Kings |
How about for Lord of the Rings-
We Love to Walk (No, the Eagles COULD NOT Have Just Flown Us To Mordor). |
Treebeard wanted for LotR
"Bilbo dissapears, Frodo gets the ring, four hobbits get stuck in the woods, they go to Bree then Strider takes them to Weathertop by the Witchking, they get to Rivendell, get another man, an elf, and a dwarf, then Gandalf battled the Balrog in Moria, and fell, the rest of the fellowship went to Lothlorien, Boromir got killed, Frodo and Sam left, Merry and Pippin got taken by orks, then Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli went to follow them, Frodo and Sam got Gollum, Gollum leads them to the dead marshes, Merry and Pippins orc gang got Attacked by orks, they escaped into Fangorn and met Treebeard, Frodo and Sam got to the Black Gate then left, Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli got to Edoras, Merry and Pippin got to the Ent-Moot, The Battle at helms deep, The ents and Merry and Pippin destroyed Isengaurd, Frodo and Sam went up the Stairs of Cirith Ungol, Pippin gets the Palantir then looks at it, Frodo and Sam get to Shelob's cave, Pippin goes to Minis Tirith with Gandalf, Merry goes to the battle of Pellenor fields and stabs witch king while Eowen did the rest, Pippin saves Merry, Frodo gets poisoned and gets taken by orcs and thus he and Sam get into Mordor, Merry gets to the Houses of Healing, and gets healed, Sam saves Frodo they put on orc garb an walk to Mt. Doom, Pippin goes to a battle in front of the Black Gate and gets smashed by a troll, Frodo and Sam went and destroyed the ring with Gollums help, They get rescued and come back to Minus Tirith, and go home, and Beat the ruffians and Saurman in the Scouring, Sam gets married, They get to the gray havens and Frodo sails off, "Well I'm back" he said. But Merry and Pippin said that this was Ent fashion and it was too long, Bilbo and Frodo agreed. Merry and Pippin also wanted "The Adventures of Merry and Pippin" That was declined because it was not just about Merry and Pippin. Also some other suggestions-
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The Hobbit
- My army can beat up your amry - Lord of the Rings - My Pony Bill - The Eagles save my life again - Hobbits and a Horcrux |
The Hobbit:
- Out of the Silent Shire (C S Lewis objected) - The War of the Wolds (H G Wells sent Tolkien an angry letter for this one) The Lord of the Rings: - The Golden Ke- I mean Ring (Andrew Lang was suspicious) - The Hobbit's Guide to the Galaxy (The ghost of Douglas Adams traveled through time to say 'no') - Pirates of the corsairs: The Curse of the Gold Ring (Now it's just getting silly) But the Silmarillion could very possibly have been called: - Space monsters and Sumo wrestlers. No, SERIOUSLY! - Snow White And The Seven Sons of Feanor A little known tale about the later life of Aragorn and Arwen was titled: - Honey, I Forgot Our Anniversary OR How Aragorn died by being impaled on the tower of Ecthelion. |
Random Title #731
For The Sil:
~"Men are from Middle Earth, Elves are from Valinor" For LOTR ~"A tale of 2 Men, 4 Hobbits, An Elf, A Dwarf, and a Wizard" After deciding the last was too wordy, Tolkien tried this one, ~ "A tale of 2 Towers" But then decided it resembled other classics a little too closely.:Merisu: |
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For TH:
-Finders Keepers, Losers Weepers For LOTR: -Can't we just sweep it under a rug? -How to get to Mordor without really trying. For ROTK(the movie) -Gee, that Big Gulp was a baaaad idea! |
For lotr:
-the aventures of hucklemerry (pip)pin -Saurons tale, or: how I lost the ring and found it again, and thn it got destroyed -Pesky hobbits strike again -The diary of a young hobbit -How to die and come back again, only whiter and more powerful: a guide to incarnation, By Gandalf -Ring busters or for fotr: -the Gandalf for tt: -the Gandalf retuns (I still haven't found the next one, maybe "The gondor king") |
-Too much Pipe-weed (Hey, they chose the long way, didn't they? I rest my case.)
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Or possibly:
When movies are possible, make one about this and get rich. alternatively: How to find a ring lost by your fellow Maia- A guide by Gandalf. |
The ideas for Roverandom ranged from odd to insane...
- Caterandom (crossed out with the note 'not good') - Motharandom (scribbled out with 'stupid' written beside it) - Three blokes walk into a pub (considered for a while, then stabbed with a spoon) - Mr Sandman, give me your shoes! (A late night effort by Tolkien) - The Man in the Moon's least favorite Tuesday (scrapped when Tolkein realised it was a Thursday) - Wizards and Trousers: a study (back when it was a more academic piece) But a few of the ideas for 'The Letters of Father Christmas' were too bizarre... - April Fools in December (Almost gave Christopher Tolkien a heart attack... at age 5) - Father Christmas: Abominable slave owner of the Frozen wastes (this version included some... unnerving illustrations...) - Where Noldor go when they die... (scrapped as a title after Tolkien realised that Feanor would burn down Father Christmas' beard in about a second). |
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For REM fans
The Hobbit:
How the Ring was won... LotR: ...and where it got us LotR Book VI specifically: This is the end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine) |
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