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"Mr. Frodo, I just now realized we're sittin' under a troll's nostrils".
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Quote:
"Well, do you want a hand at refillin' the flask, or shall I?" Or... Frodo: "No, Sam, his name isn't MISTER Poofywickers, and if I hear you call him that again, I shall get angry." |
Frodo: You need a urine sample for what?!
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O horror, horror, horror! Tongue nor heart cannot conceive nor name thee!
The three travellers scare the wits out of Gandalf.
-- Gandalf is blown away by a gust of wind. -- Gandalf wonders about why there is writing in the sky and prepares to take it down. |
"Get off my lawn you hooligans!"
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They are just playing a game. It's called "freeze in your weirdest looking poses".
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Gandalf: I didn't say Simon Says, Aragorn! Now taste my WRATH!
Legolas: Mother may I! Mother may I! AAAAAAAIIII! |
Gandalf: "And now, everyone, repeat after me!" Aragorn: "Wow, one would never think how difficult this hoola-dancing is..."
OR As the laws of nature suddenly collapse without warning, men start glowing, steel is set on fire and Gimli's axe, ignoring the gravity, flies to stab him. OR Gimli's axe: "That's for all the years you've been just using me! Now die!" |
Aragorn: "Don't do it, Gandalf! Uncloaking is never the answer!"
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Gimli's levitational powers - applied to his axe. Aragorn's inflammatory powers - applied to his sword. Gandalf's glowing powers - applied to his staff. Legolas' stupidity powers - "Mithrandir!"
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Gandalf, did you go into the restricted area of the nuclear power plant?
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"Gandalf! Behind you!..."
--- Gandalf: "You shall not pass!" Aragorn: "Wrong line wrong place, Ian." |
Legolas realizes he's been shot.
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Aragorn: "It's all your fault, wizard! When I was small, you bestowed a curse on me that left my hand misshapen. But today I shall have my revenge!"
OR Unseen, Legolas uses the moment when others are being distracted to commit suicide by stabbing himself into the neck. |
Gimli makes the mistake of asking to see the "Balrog Scar".
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Legolas makes the mistake of thinking that there is a costume-party, and proceeds to dress as Robin Hood
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Elrond forgets the old Elvish proverb: "Lembas may 'feed the will', but it also irritates the colon."
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Elrond sees himself in mirror.
--- Elrond: what did Arwen put in my shaving cream!? |
"Elves! Tonight we dine in hell!
~*~*~ "Someone get me my brown trousers." |
Looks like a case of the Elf-lord's New Armor...
Or... Elrond: *sniff* I wanted to ride in the van with Eomer... Or... Elrond: Have you ever just stood and stared at it? Marveled at its beauty, its genius? Billions of people, living out their lives, oblivious... |
Elrond suddenly discovers that the whole thing about volcanoes is; the hot lava burns the skin.
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http://www.richardarmitagenet.com/im...bo-Dwarves.jpg
"What is this tripe?!" Bilbo is transfixed by the horror that is the latest fan fic taking The Shire by storm, 50 Shades of Gandalf the Grey Uncloaked. |
Thorin's demands for his bedroom accoutrements included a brush made with hobbit-hair and facial cream made from troll earwax.
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"I'm sure I asked for some Lego and a new Chopper bike?" Bilbo rechecks his letter to Santa on Christmas morning when he gets up to find some hairy Dwarves under the tree.
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Thorin: No, Balin, don't move. I want him to figure out for himself that he's reading it upside-down.
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"The fine print says they won't pay funeral costs if I'm in a dragon's colon."
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Bilbo: This is the script?! There are fifteen scenes where Galadriel helps Gandalf uncloak, Eowyn and Arwen mud wrestling for the hand of Thorin and the Mighty Thor swoops in at the last moment to save the day during the War of the Five Legions! Why do they allow this man to make these movies?!
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"These Dwarves sure eat a lot!" thought Bilbo, looking at the list of delicacies the Dwarves ordered for dinner.
~~~ Bilbo conciders the list that Thorin came up with off the top of his head of the potential ways to die during the journey. |
"Lonely Mountain. If convenient, come. If inconvenient, come anyway."
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Game
Eh,a very interesting game.:Merisu:
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Bilbo, considering the script, finds himself suddenly wishing that he had followed his mother's advice to not become an adult movie star. :eek:
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Dwarf poetry is so terrible, Bilbo thought. How am I supposed to tell them "as pretty as a solid rock formation" is not considered a compliment to elves?
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http://www.panhistoria.com/Stacks/No...mir_RotKsm.jpg
Eowyn notices that Faramir has a little orc blood in his hair. |
"Psst! Lord Faramir! You know this is your father's funeral, right?"
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Guards: The real action is over this way
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*golfimbul clap*
Or... In the frozen land of Gondor, they were forced to eat Aragorn's minstrel. And there was much rejoicing. E&F: yaaaaay. |
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"Ladies"
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