Bilbo: "I'm a servant of the secret fire extinguisher, wielder of the CO2 spurting tube; the trick candles shall not avail you, Fool of a Took!"

Bilbo: Hold on, hold on, I'm not eight feet from the fire yet...

The mob of disappointed Michael Delving Museum tourists finds the stolen antique fire extinguisher...

Bilbo: "Wait! I can explain this! It's not what it looks like!"


p.s. "Wow, my 500th post in Crazy Captions..."

Bilbo desperately needed a way to convince the hobbits that carbon dioxide does taste good on cake.

Bilbo: Don't blame me! No one told me there was someone in the cake. It's Hobbit tradition to set the cake on fire anyway... isn't it? :(

The rowdy audience knew to shut up when Bilbo was speaking — apart from the unfortunate Dwarf on the left of the pic. He learned the hard way.




*Incidentally, is the Caption thread taking far longer to load these past couple of days?

Bilbo: "Kids, this is what being old is all about. You get to eleventy-one and you can no longer blow out all the candles on your cake without help."

Samwise (whispering to Rosie): "That's just an excuse. The old duffer just likes mucking around with fire extinguishers. That's why he never got taken on as a FireHobbit all those years ago..."






*yes! :(

It was painfully obvious that the villagers' first choice of burning Proven Wolf Bilbo wasn't going to work...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v5...n/rotk1613.jpg

Frodo just couldn't handle the intenseness of Listerine!

Or...

Frodo regretted not having flossed when his teeth dissolved.

Or...

Oh come on, he is so faking it...

Or...

Fro: If anyone makes another Uncloaked joke, I'll be sick!

Or...

Fro v.o.: And I don't know what kinda doo-doo meats was in that gumbo, but I had ta PYOOOKE!

Frodo falls for Sams Alka-Seltzer in the Lembas trick again.

Frodo's just had a taste of Eowyn's stew.

or

Caught in mid-transformation, Frodo the rabid werewolf is confronted by the angry villagers!

I can't believe Farael is going to do this kind of a joke
 

Frodo realized, too late, that in Valinor all Valar and Maiar were... uncloacked!!!

Farmer Maggot's dog passed his rabies on to Frodo.

Frodo: "This is disgusting, but whatever turns Shelob on..."

Frodo just realized that he accidentally left the ring at Rivendell.

or

Frodo just ate one of Farmer Maggot's maggots.

...From then on Aragorn was forced to wear a hair net during meals.

slightly disturbing...
 

Frodo stopped short in the act of spitting on the sidewalk when he saw Gandalf making Lotho suck up his (Lotho's) latest fresh gob of spit with a straw. :eek:





p.s. *This scene was actually witnessed by someone close to me in "real life."*
p.p.s. Yeah, it's quite disgusting I know - but look at Frodo's face! That just embodies the look of someone witnessing that scene! ^^^

Frodo forgot his toothbrush in Rivendell.

Unknown to many, Sauron was rather accomplished in Pavlovian methods...

~ Aesthete

yummy?
 

Gimli: "Frodo!? I didn't think a pansy hobbit like you would like my favorite Dwarven delicacy. You know that's Khazad-Dum Kream right? Goblin intestines in other words?"

Holby passes on this caption
*stomach churning while trying not pull a "Frodo"*

Frodo said a naughty word and got his mouth washed out with soap.

OR

Frodo's impression of Old Yeller.

It seems that Frodo had a rare teeth melting disease... lovely.

OR

It turned out that the Nazgûl were not after the Ring after all. They just wanted to perform their (obviously, rather poor) dace routine...

Frodo: "This is the last time I'll accept Galadriel's free dental services..."

OR

Frodo finds out why Galadriel forbade him to drink from her mirror...the hard way.

Bilbo failed to mention that Frodo's great grandmother was part snail. This became apparent, however, after Frodo ordered extra salty french fries.

OR


"This is why we don't eat bath beads, even the ones shaped like strawberries. Right Frodo?"

"Yeshh.."

Frodo vows never again to take part in the 'how many extra strong mints can you cram into your mouth at once' competition.

OR

Not even the Hobbits themselves knew they were allergic to chewing gum.

"SAM!! When you said we were having albino frog for dinner, I thought you were kidding!!!"

Frodo was about to lose the 'how much squirty cream can you keep in your mouth' competition.

OR

Frodo learns the hard way that eating glue is not a fun thing to do.

The similarities are astounding...
 

Frodo just couldn't believe it wasn't butter!

Or...

Gimli: I can't believe it's not butter!
Fro: It's not?!

Too late does Frodo realise that he borrowed Boromir's shaving cream not his toothpaste....

Eat Cement, and you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

OR

Shelob's toilet was NOT a pretty sight.

It was difficult, certainly; but to stay alive, Frodo had to devour Sam.

Aragorn knew it was time for his next bath when Frodo keeled over from the smell

Galadriels's kiss wasnt was lovely as most would hope ;)

Frodo just couldn't hide his feelings when Gimli intoduced him to his sister.

Frodo: Th-th-the . . . the beard!

Frodo: This food is good.

Gollum: Thank you, master, I made it myself...

Frodo: ... ...

OR

Frodo stumbles upon an Orc shower room.

Frodo had yet another Chem lab mishap.

MallornCard Ad.
 

Toothbrush: $12
Toothpaste: $270
Having Sam and Gollum dancing uncloaked in front of you while brushing your teeth: Priceless

Stealing from you, my (former) love....

Gandalf told frodo many times not to breath in the contents of that concentrated ammonia flask.

(Note: Ammonia is the most foul smelling chemical I have had to deal with. Maybe HydroChloric acid gas was a little worse because it stung on my nose and throat, but other than that Ammonia is pretty terrible.... it's not rare to see someone being sick because of it.)

Thife!!! Goombases!!! Thife!
 

Frodo just couldn't hide his feelings when Gandalf introduced him to his sister.

Frodo: Th-th-the . . . the beard! :eek:

Sorry, I thought it was funny. :D

OR

After eating some salted chips, Frodo realises he was descended from slugs...

Frodo: *melts*