Aragorn: I will kill all of you orcs with my sword, wait, this isn't a sword, and your not orcs! what, where am I?

For the hobbit one:
Pippin: Merry, I told you not to stick that thing down the plug!

Smeagol: Hey hey! Deagol! Hey! Can you lick your teeth like this? Hey, can you? can you?
Deagol: Smeagol. Shut up, I'm trying to fish.

Smeagal: Did you notice our boat looks like a bathtub wrapped in a trash bag?

Your pal
Skip [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

Smeagol: I bet i can hold my tongue like this longer than you
Deagol:Might as well....your going to kill me in a moment anyhow. (sigh)

Smeagol: Hey, here is my best vampire impression, hissssssss...

Deagol:
"Uh...Smeagol? You're really starting to creep me out man. And for goodness sake STOP calling me precious when you lick your lips!!!"

Smeagol:hey look what i can do!
Deagol:Smeagol for the last time stop it! I'm trying to catch a fish!

(HAY! Where do you get those Smeagal and Deagal pics from?)

Smeagal: Can't....... reach....... nose......... Must........ reach.....nose.....! Deagal...... will....... make........ fun........ if ......... I........ don't......... touch........ nose......... with........ tongue!
Deagal: Oh cut it out PLEASE!

Here another one of my Photoshops. Sorry for the poor quality, still experimenting.

http://www.angelfire.com/linux/tealdude/gandalfbucs.gif

Gandalf: You've asked me to hold this flag, why?

Gandalf: Fool of a Took!!! Now you've done it! Because of you I have to carry around this flag instead of my staff! Pippin: Well it does look very err....stylish Gandalf:really? Does it now? hmm...

I got the Inch-Me and Pinch-Me in a boat pic from a link Elendur provided in this thread.

For TealDude's pic:

Gandalf: "Warren Sapp is an Orc."
[img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Gandalf: The will of Sauron is forcing me to hold this flag, I am not a Tampa Bay fan at all, I am really an Oakland fan.

Gandalf: "Frodo - you must throw this flag in the Cracks of Doom before halftime or all is lost!"

http://www.kojiroabe.com/rotk/frodoinshelobslair.jpg
So, how many Hobbits does it take to change a light bulb?

Frodo: Maybe I should come down into the basement more often...

Hah! At last, I caught that annoying firefly. *Next shot would be opening hand to look at it* Tinkerbell?!

Okay my turn:

Historician:This it what it about looked like when cave men discovered the fire.

Greetings,

Anuion
________
RC51

Sting: Hmmm, why is none of that light reflecting on me? Am I too covered in blood?

Hay, that's the next film. Is that one from lordoftherings.net?

Frodo to himself:Maybe if I just stick it up there.....don't explode....don't explode

Frodo: Ahh, yes. Giant spider, slight problem here, err... Hello? My name is Frodo, pleased to meet you...

Sam: Er..Mr. Frodo?

Frodo: Yes Sam?

Sam: I guess this isn't the best time to tell you that I have a severe case of arachnaphobia.

Frodo: Great. Just great.

~this is gonna be lame...but you have been warned~

*strange noise*

SAM:WOAH! What is that SMELL?
FRODO:umm, well, err, ehh, SO...what do you think were gonna have for lunch?
SAM: FRODO! I thought I told you not to eat any more of the Lembas Burritos!
~yeah, lame. Im funny when im random...but i cant be funny on command...~ [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Sam and Frodo are walking up in the mountians with Smeagol...Suddenly, Sam spots a redish/pink box in some grass growning by the side of the path. Sam picks up the box. He sees the words "trixs" on the side of it. He looks strangely at it...then he decieds that he was going to eat it. SUDDENLY, Smeagol looks over at him and says "Silly Hobbitsy, Trix are for kids!"
~~~LAMO~~~ [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Frodo (In the basement of Bag End): What did Bilbo store down here?

Frodo: Sam...a little more light...we'll find that Ring eventually...

Sam: **muttering to himself** Why did he have to drop it in here of all places?

Frodo in his best Jimmy Cliff voice:

I can see clearly now the rain is gone
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone all the dark clouds that made me blind
It's gonna be a bright, (bright) bright, (bright) sun shiny day
It's gonna be a bright, (bright) bright, (bright) sun shiny day http://www.reefaquariumguide.com/for...flowerplus.gif

Frodo(chanting in a sort of singing voice):I'm a little school girl , I'm a little school girl
Sam(somewhere nearby):He's finally cracked, knew i never should have easedropped.(sigh)

http://www.lordoftherings.net/legend...deadmarsh3.jpg

What's wrong with this picture. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

I don't know... what's wrong with it?

Frodo: Sam.
Sam: ...

Frodo: SAM!
Sam: What? Leave me alone!

Frodo: Haven't you read the script?
Sam: Why???

Frodo: You're supposed to walk behind me ALL THE TIME!
Sam: But can't I just once...
Frodo: SAM!!!!

Sam: Ok, ok... *as he waits for Frodo to overtake him, he mutters something like "stupid P.j."*

Frodo: The closer I get to Mordor, the more slanted everything seems. Why is this happening?
Sam: I know why, Mr. Frodo. Because of the inbalance of good and evil, Middle-earth is slanting. Since the ring is getting heavier and heavier as we travel closer to Mordor, the entire land of Mordor and everywhere around it is beginning to slope downwards. At this rate, Middle-earth will be vertical before we even reach the black gate and we'll all fall to our deaths!
Frodo: You're not making sense, Sam. How can we all fall to our deaths? Middle-earth is round!
Sam: No, Mr. Frodo. It's flat.
Frodo: It's round!
Sam: It's flat!
Frodo: It's round!
Sam: It's flat!
Frodo: It's round!
Gollum: Stupid hobbitsess! They don't realize this is a hill we climb.

Sam: *thought to himself* Hmmm, maybe I shouldn't have drunk that water over there...

A recess scene at Durgbu Dashu School for Young Uruks. The teacher is the one who looks like her head is spoiled.
-or-
The raggy, dirty, helmeted-ones are sheep in orcs' clothing, and they're being shepherded by the head-spoiled one who is actually an, albeit pensive, collie.

Pink hat girl: Why does mom keep telling me I fell in with the wrong crowd?

Here I go again,

Girl: Is this the line to the post office.
Uruk-Hai: We are at war with Elves and Human's.
Girl: That must mean post office. Ill just get to the back of the line then.

*The girl walks to the back and hear's several times the word "retard"*

Greetings,

Anuion
________
Herbal health shop

Girl: Hmmm. A little chewy, and a tad to much mustard, but when it comes to it, these Uruk-Hai sandwiches arn't half bad!