PJ: Liv

LT: What?

PJ: Take the tin foil off your head. You look like a radio wave reciever...

LT: But it's to create a frequency of Joy!


~ Aesthete

Arwen: Sorry sir, but you weren’t invited. You'll have to leave.

OR

The Elf in the background just put a "Kick Me" sign on Jackson's back.

Arwen discovered that the Middle-Earth online dating services weren't exactly foolproof.

Arwen: "But - you said you were tall, thin, muscular & in great shape! You said you were athletic, had long hair, and were of noble birth!"

PJ: "I have long hair."

PJ: So instead of a white wizard you will have a director not white but fat and...

Liv: So your tactic is to....

PJ: Uncloak? Yes, of course it is. How else can I take over Gandalf's spot?

PJ: "So my idea is to put out a 'Lord of the Rings: Off-camera affairs' documentary.
Liv: "Oh, kind of like a 'Making of' sort of thing. Where all the behind-the-scenes people are finally given credit."
PJ: "No actually. Uh, it's about all the, um, how do I put this tactfully.... It's about all the moral affairs, or maybe I should say marriage affairs, that went on behind the cameras."
Liv: "What! I didn't even know that kind of thing was happening."
PJ: "Oh, yes, that's the problem. There really aren't any... but that's where you and I come in..."
Liv: :eek:

OR

Liv Tyler suddenly spots a mouse sleeping in Peter Jackson's hair.

Liv: Now let me get this right. Viggo walks down to me - We embrace and kiss passionately - I slide back off his shoulders looking deeply and joyously into his eyes - Then we walk hand in hand to the Hobbits. Right?

PJ: YEP

Liv: Huh ... So where's the part where I slap Miranda with the back of my hand for hittin' on my man?

Liv wasn't amused with PJ's solution for cheap hair extensions...

PJ: "Look, Liv, it's show business, you take what you can get without overpaying. The seaweed looks fine, it's just you."

PJ: and this is wear King Kong coms up to you slowly

Arwen: getting ahead of yourself aren't ya PJ?

Arwen: What are you laughing at? Gandalf isn't uncloaked is he?

P-j: No, it’s just the new picture.

http://img-nex.theonering.net/images/scrapbook/9231.jpg

Gandalf's job in escalator maintenance was not his favourite.

OR

Denethor is so engrossed in his game of Tetris that he hasn’t seen Gandalf and Pippin stealing all his furniture. There was only one more thing to collect.

Pippin stands back as Gandalf prepares to take denethor off-guard by...UNCLOAKING HIMSELF

So good a spy was the Peregrin, that he made it right into the Throne Room with neither of the enemy even suspecting he was there.

Myopic Denethor awaits his blushing bride, but he's not too impressed with the scruffy bridesmaid.

Gandalf: 'Good evenin' Sir, I'm Chief Inspector Mithrandir & this is Detective Sergeant Took, we're here about the burglary....'

Denethor: 'Its terrible, Inspector! I just got back from the bingo & found it like this. They've taken everything - telly, video, my Catherine Cookson omnibuses & my People's Friend annuals....

The mall Santa took a less jolly approach to Christmas this year.

Denethor: *whispering* Come on, just a few more feet and I can pull the trap door leaver!

OR

[For those Doctor who fans who are interested in the 'new' series]

Pippin: We've been through a lot haven’t we Gandalf? Running for our lives! And now Hopping! Hopping for our lives! Do you remember hopping? Hopping? No?

Denethor had been a bad steward and now had to sit in the dreaded black chair for three hours...

On the way to carry out a lynching...
 

It was down to the last three villagers and Pippin had bought Gandalf's case against Denethor. Two votes had been cast and the lynching was about to be carried out - but Pippin really began to second-guess himself when he spotted the suspiciously tail-shaped bulge in the back of Gandalf's cloak...

Gandalf had no sense of decency and had to inspect Gondor's new state of the art bathroom facilities. He found it rather opulent.

Gandalf: My Lord and Steward, Denethor, where are Gondor's defenses? The Enemy is literally right outside your door! I should think you've been sleeping!

Denethor: ::snore, snore::: Huh...ugh...um...grumble, grumble...::snore::

OR

When Denethor calls in the Army of Minas Tirith to take arms he certainly expected more than an old man and his grandson.

Gandalf knew things had changed in Gondor, but he did not expect to see Harvey the Rabbit sitting on the White Throne.

(Sorry, if anybody actually gets that joke I'll be impressed.)

OR

Denethor used to sit in the actuall throne, but now that his arthritis is acting up, he's been forced to kick Faramir out of the "time out" chair.

Gandalf: Darnit! I wanted to be fashionably late to the ball!

Pippin: I suppose you could use that lame "wizards arrive exactly when they mean" excuse.

Gandalf discovers why his post hasn't been arriving. It turns out the post office consists of one old man in a chair.

OR

Denethor: What dose my horoscope say today the? Hmm. "You will be visited by an annoying man dressed in white who will hit you several times with his staff" Pfft! It'll never happen.

Gandalf later denied having anything to do with the throne toppling sideways onto a sleeping Denethor. He also refused to comment on the Hobbit-sized footprints on the steps, and the duct tape over Pippin's mouth.

Denethor struggles to free himself from his new Chinese finger trap before the scene begins.

OR

"In his hand a white golden rod and a golden knob. He did not look up. Solemnly they paces the long floor towards him, until they stood three paces from his foot stool."

Denethor: (Thinking) Couldn't those two wait? I'm just a couple of pages to end of this chapter! :mad:

That is one of my favourite films ever - I adore James Stewart.

It was a tense moment in the Gondor Open Statues final.

A badly dejected Denethor awaits for the latest TV cable repair crew.

Gandalf: I bet you 10 Gold pennies that he's in a bad mood.

Pippin: Done!

Gandalf: I didn't mean... okay then.

Neither Gandalf nor Pippin were prepared for the shock of seeing the Phantom of the Opera without his mask.

Denethor: *grumble-grumble-curse* "Blasted Fiend! Release thy lid, foul pickle jar!"

OR

Gandalf: "What have you done Denethor! You've completely thrown off this room's groove. Your black chair is way off center and *tuh* just look at those candlesticks! One has eight candles while the other has only five!" *shakes head*

OR

Pippin decides to hang back a bit. It's never good when the guy in white confronts the guy in black. (Not that he's prejudice. ;) )

OR

Gandalf: "Denethor!"
Denethor: "Gandalf!"
Pippin: "Pippin!"

So it was that the two greatest uncloakers in the land met at last. Why Pippin was there was anyone's guess.

OR

Denethor: Nearly! Nearly! What? Why is that green block in the middle of the whites? I hate rubix cubes!

Gandalf tries the old levitating trick in hopes of drawing Denethor's attention.

Gandalf has come with his gameboy to trade his Lv 5 Orcumon for denetor's Lv 15 Trollrog what they dont relize is Pippin has already collected all 150 Middle-Earth pokemon

As Denethor presented his annual budget report, Gandalf realised that political apathy in Minas Tirith was at an all-time high.

OR

Gandalf realises too late that he forgot to send out Denethor's birthday party invitations.

OR

Gandalf's two-step jig was an utter failure: it had Denethor bowing in disgust and it had Pippin retreating swiftly.

Pippin could never take a hint and even after discussing his status as being "baggage" he still would trail Gandalf anywhere he went.

Pippin: "What about the SOUS!?"

Gandalf: "Steward Of Unusual Stubbornous? I'm hoping he doesn't exist."

Gandalf starts to advance in a dignified fashion, unaware that Pippin, under his Elven Cloak, has tied his shoelaces together...

Gandalf was determined to collect a hefty donation for the "Shuttle-Home Ride for Inebriated Miniature People" (SHRIMP) fund; for emphesis, he brought along this year's newly selected poster boy.

Deneathor (thinking to self): Oh here comes that self-rightous do-gooder again...I'll just toss him a couple of bobs...then maybe he'll leave me alone...

Gandalf: Denethor this is madness! You can't attach wheels to Minas Tirith! You just can't contend with Mount Zoom!

OR

Denethor: You think you are wise, Mithrandir, but for all your subtleties you have no cloak... wait... that’s not good! :eek:

Denethor was disapointed at this year's turnout. NOBODY wanted to see the Gondorian Fashion Show anymore. Maybe if he hired models who were less hairy and less inclined to decloak in the middle of the show.... Nah.