From the TV: Oops! Did I do that?

Pippin: *laughing hysterically* That Urkel, he's hilarious

Merry: I know where can the writters think of such things.

Pippin: "I feel so tall!"

OR

Pippin doesn't realize that there's a snake around his neck.

OR

Merry and Pippin: "Pizza!"

OR

Merry: "Hey Pip! Did you hear the one about the smart blonde?!"
Pippin: "Of course not! There are no smart blondes!"*

OR

Merry and Pippin: proof that ale and pipeweed do not mix well.

OR

Pippin: "I love my lips!"


*This 'blonde joke' is not meant to offend or degrade. It is merely the exploitation of a well known stereotype for humorous purposes. Any complaints or questions should be directed to me.

Merry & Pippin: We're Hobbits of the Round Table.
We dance whene'er we're able.
We do routines and chorus scenes
With footwork impeccable...

This may be a bit obscure
 

Merry found Pippin's Dominic Deegan impression quite amusing, but he found the Seer's revenge hilarious.

Merry: Pippin? A knight of Gondor? Laughable!

Pippin: Yeah! That's just - wait a minuet!

OR

Merry: Did you hear that, Pip? Gandalf the grey uncloaked indeed! That would never happen! Ha ha ha! Pip? PIP? :eek:

Pippin:" SO then I bribed Gandalf with a a case of Old winyards and some Longbottom Leaf to tell cousin Frodo that this old ring was not only a magic ring but the "One Ring to Rule all other Rings" and that he had to take it to be destroyed in Mordor - and he believed me... he's sold his house and everything!!!!"

Merry: " And the ring in fact? "

Pippin: "Came from Lobelia's curtains"

As evidenced here, Napolean Dynamite is just as funny the 43rd time as the 1st time.

Merry: "There are no Morlocks in Middle-earth!"

Frodo: (Offfscreen.) "Oh, yeah? Well, take a look at the next picture."
http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d7...um-capture.jpg

Frodo: "Duck season!"

Gollum: "No, Hobbit season, my precious!"

A spirited game of Keep Away, Middle-Earth style.

Gollum just didn't understand why Sam kept telling him to fetch.

Frodo, Sam and Gollum reenact the famous 3-way shootout scene for "The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly.

Gollum: It is ours-s-s, precious-sss is-s-s ours-ss, at las-s-st, at las-sst!
Sam: Mr. Frodo, he is alive, Stinker is alive! But I saw him fall down them Cracks of Doom or whatever!
Frodo: Yes, Sam, so I see. But poor thing is all grey and cindered...
Sam: Poor thing?! Poor thing?! He bit your poor finger off! But never mind, Mr. Frodo I'll lay my hands on him!
Gollum: It can't, it can't! Nas-s-sty rude hobbit can't, can it? Precious-s-ss makes-ss us-ss s-sstrong, s-strong and fireproof, my precious-s-ss!

Frodo decides that cutting his own arm off might be more enjoyable than talking at any length with Gollum.

Merry was right behind him. If he kept up his pace, Frodo knew his team could win the race. But suddenly, a feeling of deep horror came over him. He forgot who he was supposed to pass the baton to!

At first, Gollum had thought it was a compliment when Frodo told him he was "fetching".

Two wolves cut out the eyes of the Seer.

OR

Green cloaks were all the rage, and Gollum was completely out of the loop.

Merry/Pippin pic
--------------------

Having consumed three pints and two "whole-halves" already makes those Donald Trump toupee jokes just that much more funny.

Animated LotR pic
----------------------

Frodo knew he was in for a tough fight as soon as Gollum's eyes latched onto the last breadstick.

The eyes are the window to the soul...

or

Frodo: Now, it's quite simple to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana. First of all you force him to drop the banana; then, second, you eat the banana, thus disarming him. You have now rendered him 'elpless.

No one liked Gollum's singing.

The Tyranny of Technicolour

Frodo: "Stand still, I'm going to colour you in! I've got a crayon and I'm gonna use it!"

Gollum: "Leave me alone! Everything was better when the world was in black and white!"



OR



Victim of one too many alien abductions, when Frodo cornered a 'grey' one evening he decided to return the favour and give the little guy a 'probe'.

Frodo: “Is this the elusive phantom of whom we’ve heard so many tales?”

Sam: “No, I don’t think so. The phantom is rumored to be taller, and according to the lasses at the Green Dragon he’s wondrous fair to look upon.”

Gollum: “Meaning we’re not, I take it, precious?”

Gollum: "Are they... taters, my Precious?"

Sam: "No, we're bur- ah, hobbits."

Frodo: "Burrahobbits!"

Gollum: "Burrahobbits, my Precious?"

Sam: "Yes, Burrahobbits. And we cook much better than we cook, don't you know?"

Gollum: "Better than nasty taters?"

Frodo: "Yes...."

Gollum: "Supper, my Precious!"

I have NO idea where that just came from... I guess those cartoon hobbits look like Potatoes to me...

Frodo and Sam found themselves in a horrible fanfiction cross-over: Night of the Living Gollum

frodo: Expecto patronum!!!! Whoops! sorry wrong movie!! :rolleyes:
lol :D

After Gollum's violent reaction Frodo must check for himself if his underarm odor is truly worse than Shelob's Lair.

Gollum - "Lord of the apes" finds difficulty in breaking the news to Frodo that Sam makes a better Jane!

Sorry folks...
 

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Gollum: Master must not look behind him!

Frodo: Why?

Gollum: Nasty grey man with no cloak!

(Notice that the person to the left appears to have a wand in his hand.)

Gollum: "Who's that, Preciouss?!"
Bilbo: "Yes, who exactly are you, and why are you in Gollum's cave?"
??????: "What? This is... Gollum's cave? Where is that?"
Bilbo: "Under the Misty Mountains, in Middle-Earth. Now who are you?"
??????: "Oh, Harry Potter, sir."
Bilbo: "Uhm... You're in the wrong story. In fact, the wrong world."
Harry: "Well, I followed my directions..."
Gollum: "Oh, did it ussse MapQuesst, Preciouss, did it?"
Harry: "Well, yes... I thought it would be easy."
Bilbo: "No! It will always lead you astray!"
Gollum: "Yess! We hatess MapQuesst, we doess!"

Gollum plays the title role in a twisted rendition of "Oedipus Rex."

Gollum's fundamental inability to grasp Hide & Seek led to increasingly short games.

Here in the middle of nowhere Frodo & Sam stumble across one of those fanatical Oakland Raiders fans.

Gollum: What's that precious? Why's that stupid fat man replacing me?

http://w13502.hostcentric.net/~newli...r3AP_92754.jpg

This cameo was simply not working out.


or


Liv: So in this scene I am suppose to kiss you

PJ: Yes and remember it has to be believable so make it very intimate

Liv: Ummmm Okay

Elrond had said that Aragorn had grown in many ways...

Now we can see why Liv was so upset in the appendixes when she talked about them wanting her to kiss a stand-in for Viggo...

PJ: so you see... me killing off Aragorn was a good thing for me...the fans may hate it but at least i get arwen!

Little did PJ know that he was about to be killed.

For all the Whose Line Lovers
 

PJ and Arwen stand in front of the Green Screen...

More kissing
 

The thoughts of Liv: Oh no, I hate that! Now he's going to kiss me and tell me that he loves me and wants to marry me, and call me " litlle, naughty Charlene." And tomorrow he'll have forgotten all about it. . .


(Hey, at least I gave it a shot)

Arwen: Frodo! It's been awhile, I haven't seen you since you were this short.

PJ: HEY, HEY, HEY!

LIV: You know what PJ, everybody calls you long-play record!

PJ: Why's dat Liv?

LIV: Cause you don't never shut up!