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-   -   Tolkien puns (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=5335)

Evenspire 07-01-2001 04:46 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 13
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Puns line

Which was your favorite Denathor in Jurassic Park?

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the Faramir of all?


Travlin' through Bombadill-o Texas

Who Took my ring? Pippin!!!!

To save the Peragrin falcons.

&quot;We're having Pippin apple pie for lunch today.&quot; stormed Gandalf







</p>

obloquy 07-01-2001 09:17 PM

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Posts: 33
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Re: Puns line

&quot;Luthien what I'm theein'?&quot;

Thath what Beren might've thed if he had had thumone with him when he thtumbled upon Luthien thinging.

</p>Edited by: <A HREF=http://www.barrowdowns.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_profile&u=00000090>obloquy</A> at: 7/1/01 11:25:56 pm

Evenspire 07-02-2001 05:33 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 15
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Pun

Simon and Glorfingel sing The Sound of Silence

Rocky and Glorfingel meet Boris Badinov in Spottsilvania

Maybe we can smeagle some firecrackers across the border.

I'm so Gil-galad to be back at Bag End!

</p>

KM Tinuviel 07-02-2001 08:57 AM

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Posts: 27
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Re: Pun

OK, I've been waiting for her to speak up, but maybe she doesn't post, so....my fave is the nick of one of my chattin' buddies: The X Phial....isn't that great? <img src=wink.gif ALT=";)">

"Long Beren lay, and his spirit wandered upon the dark borders of death, knowing ever an anguish that pursued him from dream to dream. Then suddenly, when her hope was almost spent, he woke again, and looked up, seeing leaves against the sky; and he heard beneath the leaves singing soft and slow beside him Luthien Tinuviel. And it was spring again."</p>

Evenspire 07-02-2001 09:05 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 17
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Punssss


And I, gentlemen,...have 4 aces. Eowyn! Eowyn! (I win)

Said Santa at the beach, &quot;I Mithrandir&quot; (I miss rheindeer)

&quot;Pick up after yourself and don't be such a Shelob!&quot;

</p>

Evenspire 07-02-2001 09:15 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 19
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Puuuuns

And I'll haaaave...the grilled cheese samwise with Frodo cornchips and pippin hot tomato soup.





</p>

Gilthalion 07-02-2001 11:17 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Hobbitus Emeritus
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Re: Puuuuns

Mordor Most Foul



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Evenspire 07-02-2001 11:57 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 22
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Very punny

No thank you, I don't care for grima beans.

When I grow up, I'm going to Merry-a-doc (marry..)

</p>

Evenspire 07-02-2001 12:10 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 23
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Punny

The first Psychoanalyst: Sigmund Frodo

Tiger Woods is one of the world's greatest gaffers.


I'm a-frodo it's quite serious.



We have sam, sam, eggs, bacon, sausage and sam.
Sam eggs, bacon, sam and sam. Sausage, sausage, sam, eggs and sam...

But I don't like sam! Couldn't I just have eggs and sausage?

Without sam!? Blehh!

Well, sausage, sausage, sam, eggs and sam doesn't have much sam

(music begins) sam sam sam sam, sam sammity sam..

</p>

Evenspire 07-02-2001 01:42 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Animated Skeleton
Posts: 26
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Pun fun in the sun

I need to wash up, I feel grima after the long trip

Eomer Simpson

I shire could go fer sum food!

I work at the pizza parlor where I Fro-do in the air.



</p>

Evenspire 07-02-2001 03:33 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Animated Skeleton
Posts: 27
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Pun

Have you met my ent Bertha? I hate it when she pinches my cheeks!



</p>

Evenspire 07-02-2001 06:31 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Animated Skeleton
Posts: 29
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Puns

And they caaaall the wiiiiind Moriah

As sung by Moriah Carey.

Rhun for your lives!

Oh for Grey Haven's sake!

</p>

Halbarad 07-12-2001 08:04 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 20
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Re: Puns

There was no Eriador than the door in front of them...

I have a Thror foot...

Thrain in Spain falls mainly in...

Beren chips is my favourite meal...

:-)

Puns away!

A little people, but of great worth are the Shire-folk. Little do they know of our long labour for the safekeeping of their borders, and yet I grudge it not</p>Edited by: <A HREF=http://www.barrowdowns.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_profile&u=00000248>Halbarad </A> at: 7/12/01 10:07:16 pm

Evenspire 07-13-2001 05:51 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 71
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Puns

Beren mind that I'm Luthien my mind.

Ent misbehavin', savin' my love for youuuu.

I got my gerbil a hobbitrail.

Gimli a smile!

My oak tree is dropping Aragorns.

He's got the wight stuff.

Ferny you should mention Bree.

</p>

Mister Underhill 07-13-2001 07:24 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Dread Horseman
Posts: 734
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Re: Puns

&quot;He's Got the Wight Stuff&quot;

Possible title for your memoirs, BW?

Or just &quot;The Wight Stuff&quot;. Tom Wolfe, we're ready for you to document our wild, seat-of-our pants, oh-so-intriguing lifestyles.

Classic. Well done, Evenspire!

</p>

Evenspire 07-13-2001 10:59 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 72
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Punny

You go to the left, I'll take the wight.

You sit on the left, I'll sit on the wight.

I need an answer wight away.

You'll have your answer wight now.

Will you wight me every day?

Two wrongs don't make a wight.

Sorry.....
I think I did my best work on Minas Tirith (What s/he would never say.)

</p>

Evenspire 07-13-2001 11:05 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 73
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Puns

What kind of cheese would you like with that? We have orcanzola and bree.



</p>

Evenspire 07-13-2001 11:18 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 74
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Pun,

Book, &quot;What it Took to Hook a Took&quot;

How do you tell a male Dwarf, from a female Dwarf? I don't know, I'll axe one.

I like literature, but I'm shy. When I grow up, I wanna be a ghost rider, er, a ghost wighter.

One dark rider to another, &quot;No, no! We're looking for Baggins! Not baggage!&quot;






</p>

Evenspire 07-13-2001 02:52 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 75
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Tolkien puns

From the Halls of Khazad-dum-a
To the shores of Ithilien
We will fight the one eye's battles
We're the fighting Uruk-hai

</p>

Evenspire 07-13-2001 03:42 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 76
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Puns

I squished a big strider and flushed it down the toilet.

There's a &quot;daddy longshanks!&quot;

Your table is weady. Wight this way!

Enter the contest today, anduin a trip for two!

Jan Brady, &quot;That's all I EVER hear! Dead marshes, marshes, marshes!&quot;



</p>

SteadfastSam 07-13-2001 04:30 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Wight
Posts: 157
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Re: Puns

I Thingol go outside and Snaga bit of Sunshine. (that was bad)

Where have you been? &quot;I Fingolfin.&quot; (ouch)

&quot;Waiter! &quot;Morgoth of milk over here please! What do you mean you are out! Find a cow and Melkor! (oh, my)

Grishnahk and Bill went up the hill to fetch the Ring of Frodo,
Grishnahk fell down and broke his crown, and Bill came tumbling after.

Erebor! I'll go find someone more interesting to talk to!

I'm &quot;Galad&quot; Riel stopped by today, he owned my a train tolkien.

Here we go Elrond the mulberry bush....

I need to stop now! <img src=laugh.gif ALT=":lol">

"Good Morning!" said the dragon. "You seem surprised."
"Good Morning! said Farmer Giles. "I am that!"
Farmer Giles of Ham </p>

Evenspire 07-13-2001 07:25 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 77
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Pun

Mork from um, um......orc

Frodo cat! Neener, Neener, Neener.

Did you see Michael Delving in the tool shed?

How do you know when a blonde has been at the computer? There's wight-out all over the screen.

(I'm blonde by the way, and I have no wight-out, I use an eraser.)

A pawade of wight-supwemacists, recwuiting mowe wights.

Fight to keep youw civil wights.

The American Civil Wights Owganization.

Wight On!

Waise youw wight hand and wepeat aftew me.

</p>

Halbarad 07-16-2001 05:15 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Pile o' Bones
Posts: 21
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<img src="http://www.barrowdowns.com/images/posticons/sting.jpg" align=absmiddle> No more wight puns :)

Enough of the wight puns already! aaaarrrrghhh!

Loved he Elrond one.

Some more:
Smile! Why do you look so Gollum?
Smaug is a big problem in Bangkok
I love watching the Turin cars...
Was Old man Willow a Hurin? (huorn)


</p>

Gilthalion 07-17-2001 06:59 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Hobbitus Emeritus
Posts: 480
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<img src="http://www.barrowdowns.com/images/posticons/sting.jpg" align=absmiddle> Alwight alwight alweady!

I arda smack you!

Mirromere on the wall:
...I can't see my reflection!

I left my hart in Mirkwood Forest.

Gondor to door. Be back later.

He's an hobbitual offender.



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Evenspire 07-17-2001 08:48 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 88
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Puns

Real men don't eat quiche lorien

I ordered my underwear from a Smeagol catalog.

The orks go on the left, the knives on the right.

The dinner special today is ork and beans.

All ork and no play makes Sam a dull boy.

Broadway! Time Square! New Ork City!

Troll-house cookies just melt in your mouth!

...nine, ten, elven, twelve..here I come!

He took a bad fall and may have broken his Feanor.

Tuor better than one.

I hope he wins the Tuor de France!

Oooh! Looks like another gloin injury folks!






</p>

Evenspire 07-17-2001 09:03 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 89
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Pun

Should we thank Frodo now? Orthanc him later?

While on manuvers, Sam came under mordor fire.

Gimli spent the weekend in the mountains gamgee jumping.

You know what I mithrandir? I miss having modern
appliances.

Rohan Sebastian Bach




</p>

Eldarion son of Aragorn 07-17-2001 09:33 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Shade of Carn Dûm
Posts: 376
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Re: Pun

Isen that Sauron? No it's off!

Shelobs the keeper!!

Shagrat my pants!

I never Shagrat!! I shag mouse!!

Have you Fingolfin or just been pitch and puttin'









"He turned to Eldarion, and gave into his hands the winged crown of Gondor and the sceptre of Arnor, and bade him farewell."</p>

Evenspire 07-18-2001 07:18 AM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Haunting Spirit
Posts: 92
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Pun

Richie Valenz sang &quot;La Bomba-dil&quot;

Legolas has become an Alaskan salmon troller.


Scientists work hard to save relatives of Gwaihir, the California Gondor and the Paragrin Falcon.

First Sauron was a bad winner, Denathor loser.




</p>

Malagaerion 07-31-2001 04:41 PM

<font face="Verdana"><table><TR><TD><FONT SIZE="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Animated Skeleton
Posts: 32
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Re: Pun

Dial M ...for MORDOR

&quot;Hey boss, you wants I should go breaks his legolas?&quot;

<img src=smile.gif ALT=":)">

</p>

Belin 06-14-2002 09:33 AM

Hey, this is great!

If I may go back to the Shakespeare theme for a moment, it seems to me that Gollum proves that one may smial and smial and be a villain!

Incidentally, I think this new forum is a great idea. Thank you, B-W, or whosever idea it was. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

--Belin Ibaimendi

Lindolirian 06-14-2002 05:05 PM

Gimli to legolas: Hey Lego, my Eggo. C'mon now Gimli that waffle.

HerenIstarion 06-15-2002 01:36 AM

Quote:

By Evenspire
I squished a big strider and flushed it down the toilet.
that was fascinating [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Lothiriel Silmarien 06-15-2002 12:54 PM

Lindolirian, that was funny! That reminds me of that reeeeally stupid, cheesy Easy Mac commerical. "MM, this is good. I think I'll have anothe bowl." "Make me one too please!" That commercial was SO retarded. It makes me think of my friend doing that stupid impersonation.
All of those puns were funny actually [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Gimli Son Of Gloin 06-15-2002 02:11 PM

Quote:

Gimli to legolas: Hey Lego, my Eggo. C'mon now Gimli that waffle.
lol...


I have Narsil problems, I'm allergic to pollen.

Excuse me, can I have a bathroom Tolkien?

[ June 15, 2002: Message edited by: Gimli Son Of Gloin ]

Gimli Son Of Gloin 06-15-2002 05:06 PM

Is Entomology the study of Ents?

Feadolena Nolfare 06-18-2002 04:06 AM

this one was actually said by me & my Tolkien-lovin friends after a day of snowboarding:
I'm Sore, oh man! (Saruman)

Do you like fish?
Oh yeah, i practically live on Tuna
...and to go with that...
The movie made me all Tirion

When you've Gondolin, you've Gondolin.

Aack! I think I'm Luthien a tooth!

Ew. There's something Sauron this meat.

What's that cool Star Wars spaceship? An X-Wing?
No, an Elwing.

[img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img] that was really sad. never let me stay up till 3 am, ever again!

Rosa_Baggins 06-22-2002 12:00 PM

Puns

I can only think of one wright now....heheh get it?ANYWAY!

Why do you look so Smaug?

Gimli Son Of Gloin 06-22-2002 05:30 PM

By the way, what is Entomology?

[ June 22, 2002: Message edited by: Gimli Son Of Gloin ]

The Fifth 06-22-2002 10:35 PM

Ooh! I have a pun: Frodon't do that!

Rosa_Baggins 06-23-2002 08:11 AM

nice one fifth!!


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