Saruman: I am the scissors that cut the net.

Gandalf: I am the naughty child that ran off with the scissors.

Saruman: I am the naughty child's mum who spanks the naughtiness away

Gandalf: I am the iron trousers that protect the child!

Saruman: I am the rust that attacks the iron trousers

gandalf: i am the sandpaper that rubs the rust away.

Saruman: "I am your nerves that can't stand the sound of sandpaper scraping."

Gandalf: I am the old age and encroaching deafness that blocks out the sound.

Saruman: I am arthritis that stops the fingers.

Gandalf: I am the elf who offers healing at (seemingly) low prices.

Saruman: I am Aruman HMO which refuses to pay these seemingly low prices.

((I hate myself for this))

Gandalf: I am the Democratic Party's campaign to put HMOs out of business.

Saruman: I am the tabloid scandal that puts the Democratic Party's campaign into discrepancy.

Gandalf: I am the low credibility of tabloids!

Saruman: I am the lovely journalist Amanda who has just taken a job as a reporter for The Daily Moonbat and all love me and despair, etc. This naturally raises the credibility of tabloids.

Gandalf: I am the crusty old newspaper editor who fires Amanda because I am threatened by her charm.

Saruman: I am the blackmail that convinces the crusty old editor not to fire Amanda.

Gandalf: I am the integrity that cannot be threatened by blackmail (even if I can be threatened by Amanda's charm :rolleyes: ).

Saruman: I am the Dragon’s gold used to bribe the editor.

Gandalf: I am the termites that ate through the chest of dragon's gold and caused it to fall out en route.

I am the termite-eating monster that devours the termites.

Gandalf: I am the acid-reflux disease that makes the monster very ill.

Saruman: I am the Miruvor that makes it feel better.

Gandalf: I am the Hobbit who drinks all the Miruvor and gets roaring drunk

Saruman: I am the next day's hangover.

Gandalf: I am the day off work that heals the pain.

Saruman: I am the unkind boss who fires you for taking the day off.

Gandalf: I am the freak lightening bolt from the sky which fries the unkind boss to an indiscernable crisp.

Saruman: I am the rod to conduct the lighting and the orchestra!

Gandalf: I am the cockroaches that have chewed through the lightning bolt housing, causing it to fall off. I am also the cockroaches that infested the musicians' uniforms, causing them to be unwearable and causing much chaos and shrieking among the young female members.

Saruman: I am the weirdo that absolutely loves roaches and chaos.

Oh- and shrieking young ladies, of course.

Gandalf: I am about to uncloak and scare the weirdo.

Saruman: I am the court order preventing uncloaking.

Gandalf: I'm the careless assistant who shredded the court order.

Saruman: I am the irresistably hot intern who kept the careless assistant away from his work.

Gandalf: I am the Antarctic, where she was sent to cool her down and stop setting fire to the furniture. :p

Saruman: I am the combined weight of insects on Earth, whose methane emissions contribute to significant global warming and cause the Antarctic to melt.

NOTE: Uncloak and DIE!! :eek: :o

Gandalf: I am the next major ice age which will negate global warming, and decimate the insect population.

Saruman: I am an erupting Orodruin, that ends the ice age.

Gandalf: I am the boulder that blocks the fire in the vent!