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Elrond: WASSUUUUUUUUUUUP?
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Frodo: Alright fine,give me the ring.Anything to get out of this sleepy Rivendell!
Frodo: (at the boats) Quit following me Sam,geez why do you think I snuck away from ya guys? Aragorn: that Pippin and Merry got themselves in trouble,let em take care of themselves. |
Legolas or Aragorn attacking orcs: "BANZAI!!!" [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Galadrial: “Hey!!! Who drank my mirror?!”
Aragorn: (To Eowyn) “Okay... but don’t tell my wife, okay?” Gandalf: “Hey Frodo... can I have the ring?” Gullum: “I appreciate the wonder that is Tony Danza. His many fine acting roles have brought nothing but smiles of joy to this withered old hobbit.” Gimli: (In Moria) “This place is a dump!” Legolas: “Screw you guys... I’m going home.” Saruman: “You cannot leave”, Gandalf: “SLUMBER PARTY!!!!” Boromir: (Licks his finger, touches Aragorn) “Let’s get you outta those wet clothes!” Aragorn: “You know Arwen, I think I was in love with the IDEA of being in love... and not with you.” Any Eagle: “Hey, why don’t we fly you guys right into Mordor?” Boromir: “Diplomacy is our only hope!” Gandalf: “I am Gandalf of many colours!” |
Bilbo: "Frodo, lad, I give you an inheritance and what do you do? Just throw it away."
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Sauron: All I ever wanted was a hug...
Elrond to Frodo: Hey, your ring is cooler...I'll trade ya. Sauron: Little do they know...that the ring is just from a cracker jack box. Balrog: Anyone got a light? Glorfindel: I woke up on top of the Balrog and suddenly, it all was quite clear to me that I don't get paid enough for this crap. Galadriel: There's a little Sauron in all of us. ~~Daegwenn |
Here are a couple that occur:
Bilbo: One day, lad, all this will be yours Frodo: What? The curtains? Elrond (to the council): Sorry, chaps; I can't remember a thing about that business with Elendil and Isildur. It all happened so long ago, and what with the Death Watch beetle in the West wing and the Hall of Fire needing redecoration it's all just slipped my mind. Arwen: If you expect me to sit here sewing a bleedin' banner while you go gallivantin' off with yer mates you've another think coming, Estel. There are plenty more fish in the sea, you know. Boromir: Anyone for croquet? Sauron (from the Palantir): Tell him he can keep the damn' thing. It turns my finger green and interferes with the television. [ March 05, 2002: Message edited by: Squatter of Amon Rudh ] |
Sauron: So I built a tower. Everyone said that it wouldn't stand up. And it fell into the swamp. So I built another tower. That fell into the swamp too. So I build a THIRD tower. That one stayed up AAAAAAAARGGHHHHHHHH!
*Dark Tower crashes into ruin* Mouth of Sauron to Gandalf after LONG pause: Uhhh...we give up. Sorry. Treebeard: Boring, boring, boring. Green. Green. and MORE green. And some brown. Gawd. I want to get AWAY from all this. Bulldoze it down, and build me a condo. Hoom. Gimli: Why do we kill these orcs all the time? Why don't we just try TALKING to them for once? Ugluk to Merry and Pippen: Are you two comfortable enough? Want some more cushions? Here, have a doughnut. Not far now. Gwaihir to Gandalf: Good grief. Are you all right? Gandalf: Feeling a bit...weak...that Balrog sure was a tough cookie... Gwaihir: Do you have the strength to lift your hand? Gandalf: Just....about...yes.... *Gandalf raises hand* Gwaihir: Now shout 'TAXI!' *flies off* You're right Lush, this is a great thread. [ March 05, 2002: Message edited by: JesseCuster ] |
Gimli: Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho, it's off to work we go! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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any hobbit: I'm going on a diet
Gandalf: Ooo! is that taffy? Tom Bombadil: My stock just went up 8 shares! Gollum: Wow I just went 9 sentences without saying My Preciousssss! New record. Sam: Good job Gollum. Gandalf to Frodo: No don't eat it it's evil! Frodo with ring in his mouth: Sorry. |
Sam: *sniff sniff* "Mmm, Shelob, are you wearing Eu de Freaky Arachnid? It's my favorite, you know!"
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Hey! No dwarf jokes.
(Hehe, just kidding) |
Birdie BOL! Oh, those Eagles kill me!
"Taxi!" (Heeeeeee!) |
Any Hobbit: Does this make me look fat?
Sam: I absolutely hate kids! Can't abide the little vermin! Always mucking about in my garden, ruining everything... Galadriel: Well, we sort of, um, ran out of lembas. Have this box of crackers instead! Any Hobbit: Oh, no thank you! I couldn't stand another bite! Pippin: Okay, I've had just about enough of this! I happen to have an advanced bachelor of sciences in nonlinear dynamics! If someone calls me a "fool Took" one more time, I'm going to start testing theories! Gandalf to Merry: What'd he say? Merry: Mah hommie be tired o' everyone walking all ova' him. If you dis 'im again, he gonna start crackin' heads, mah brotha'. Aragorn at Amon Hen: Arg! That stupid Horn! Boromir, shut it! If I have to hear that thing one more time I'm going to stuff it up your nose! Merry to Pippin while being carried by Orcs: Man this is fun! Sign on Bag End front gate: Gond troll tippin'. Be back in a fortnight. Gandalf: Pipeweed? Ugh, can't stand the stuff! Give me some good ol' cappucino, though; now that's an addiction worth having! Gwaihir: *crows like a rooster* Erm, you didn't hear that. Beorn: Orcs can count and twelve isn't fifteen...is it? Um...oh dear, I hate these kind of questions! *starts counting on fingers frantically* |
Just thought of another one.
Eowyn: Forget all that riding around on horses and fighting Nazgul, I'll just stay here with my sewing. |
lol....i should wonder if you all will be recognised on a grander scale......
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Frodo: Aragorn, why did you volunteer to come with me to Mordor?
Aragorn: Anything's better than staying in Rivendell with Arwen talking about "our relationship" |
Quote:
Legolas at Helm's Deep: *singing* Everybody was Kung-fu fighting! HUH! *stabs Orc* Those cats were fast as lightning! HUH! *stabs Orc* It was little bit frightning... Sam: But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Rosie is the sun! Minstrel of Gondor: *hack, cough* I'm really sorry but I can't sing today. I seem to have come down with larengitis... Sam/Frodo: Aw, shucks! Sam: I was really wantin' to hear that "Frodo of the Nine Fingers" song again! It was so wonderful! Minstrel: Well, I could call my friend Leonard Nimoy. He knows a few good tunes... Frodo: Like "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins"?! Minstrel: *nods* Sam/Frodo: YAY!!! Frodo: *twirling the Ring around on its chain and whistling the Harlem Globetrotters' theme song* Saruman: Oh, look at the widdle Halfwings! They're so darn cute I just wanna squeeze 'em! Eee! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] |
Rosa Underhill........
*sounding like the Skeksies Chambelain* Hmmmm...? ....whatever do you mean? |
Gandalf leading a mob with signs walking around Orthanac: The end is coming!
Pippen or Merry: Pipeweed?! Are you trying to kill me? Do you have any idea what that stuff does to your lungs? and Breath, phew! Frodo: Mushrooms? No thanks, I'm alergic. Sauron: I think what we have here is just one big misunderstanding. Aragorn: Can't we all just get along? Pippin and Merry: Sorry, we don't drink and ride. Treebeard: Can you please stop! You keep on going on and on about your little adventures, do you think I care? You are going to make me late for my meeting, could you please talk a little faster. Legolas: Can you please speak up? I'm hard of hearing. or Drat, I forgot my glasses, say, what's that big dark blur that fills me with horror up there? Gimili: Ewww! There's dirt everywhere! Gross! I need a bath. Arwen: No! don't touch that, Aragorn, that's poison ivy! Aragorn: Sorry, I get confused sometimes, What's that, Frodo? You are itching? Darn it! Gollum to the Ring: I think we should see other people. Elrond to Arwen: No, you can not marry him, and that's final, I know I said that if he ruled Gondor and all that, but things change sweetie. What's that? You gave him your imortality? What were you thinking? Didn't we already talk about this? Borimir: Gold isn't my color. Sam: I am so sick of all these home cooked meals! Can't we just go out to eat for a change? Bilbo to Frodo: I'm disappointed in you, my boy. I thought you would take better care of your inheritance than that! Bilbo: Drat, another Writer's Block! |
Pippin: Personally I find Nietzsche's theory of the "Uebermensch" to be far more convincing than Descartes' inherent Randomism.
Merry: Personally I think you've been looking into the Abyss too long, my friend (dusty academic laugh). Aragorn: God, what *was* that thing? It was frickin' terrifying! And someone who always gets left out: Ioreth's Kinswoman: Will you be quiet already? I want to watch King Elessar and the Ernil i Pheriannath, not listen to you! |
LOL!
Bilbo: 'Don't meddle in the affairs of Dialectical Materialists, Frodo my lad, for they are always trying to reconcile thesis and antithesis. What a bother!' Thag u. Thagu very buch.... |
I LOVE that song Rosa. I also really liked that one when Sam thinks about taking the ring.
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These are great, I love the "Old McBilbo had a ring" one. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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Legolas: Ai! Ai! A Logical Positivist is come!
Well, it would scare me! [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img] [ March 08, 2002: Message edited by: Glenethor ] |
OK, since we're on that theme...and since I've been consuming far too much caffeine this evening...
Gandalf: Long, long I argued, and he argued with me. Then at last we came to dark and wet place, and his fiery Argumentum ad Hominem became like unto a thing of slime, the dread Petitio Principii, called also by the Dwarves the Circular Argument. We fought, and I debunked his use of the Fourth Element, and threw him down. Then he fled away through the nameless tunnels where gnaw the Argumentum Ad Absurdum and the foul Poisoning of the Well. I followed, clutching his cursed Venn Diagram. Up we went to the peak, and there I conjured a Proof, and so he passed away. |
Theoden on the Pelennor Fields:
"Get...this...horse...OFF ME!" |
Eowyn to the Witch-King: That Goth gear is so passeee....
Arathorn to Aragorn: Whadda ya mean ya don't want to be betrothed to Eowyn? She has...vast tracts of....land! Aragorn: but I don't like it, father! I want to....SING! father! I don't want to take up Anduril and go mucking about in the wild! I just want to SING! SING! SING! |
Just thought up a couple, these are good. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
Any Dwarf: I don't want to find gold or jewels, I want to paint trees. Any Ringwraith: Can I get a mask or some make-up and contacts? I'm tired of being invisible. Hey, I'm a haunting spirit now. Cool, muahahahahaha [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] [ March 08, 2002: Message edited by: Gorin Icearms ] |
Bless you, Kalimac - someone's finally given Ioreth's kinswoman something to say! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Now, if we could just get her a name! (See the thread "A Sad Literary Fate", Books II)
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Aragorn (coronation speech, wearing bobble hat): Follow your dreams; you can reach your goals; I'm living proof.
Denethor: Man I'm bummed out. Anyone got a joint? Faramir: Tell you what, lads: you ambush the Haradrim and I'll stay here and make us a nice cup of tea. Legolas: Tree? What tree? *walks into huge and hoary oak* Sam to Galadriel: *raises eyebrow* A box of dirt. That was worth travelling hundreds of miles for. I don't suppose you've got any other rubbish you'd like me to take off your hands while I'm at it. Tom Bombadil: Before you leave, my lads, I'll just relate my life story, in case you have any questions-o. Galadriel: Does my bum look big in this gown? Eowyn: I'm afraid I'm quite hopeless at all these men's games. I'll just stay here and darn your socks, father. Gollum: Raw fish? Does we look Japanese, precious? Mouth of Sauron at the Morannon: Now listen and listen good because it's only coming once. We surrender. Unconditionally. Sorry to have taken up your time. Sorry. Sorry. Sauron: Mouth, that is as ridiculous as that idea you had that they might send a couple of hobbits through Cirith Ungol to chuck the Ring into the Sammath Naur. Now go and prepare my ceremonial tutu. |
Quote:
Ioreth: Hmmm...No, no, don't know anything about him, sorry dear. Ioreth: I can't think of a thing to say... Sam: You know what I'd like right about now, Mr. Frodo? A Big Mac. And a super-sized order of fries...Mmmmm.... Merry: (from RotK cartoon) Zoiks, Scoob! *everyone stares* What? What'd I say? |
Éowyn: Oh, no, I broke a nail!
Denethor: Remember, kids, don't play with fire. Saruman: Save the trees! Anyone in the novel: Wassap! |
Lots and lots of LOL! They are great guys.. here is my meagre attempt!
Ghan-Buri-ghan: Perhaps we can negotiate a contract for the transitory movements of your troops through this passage of our land.. starting with a 10% deposit... |
Grishnákh (to Uglúk): "It's a pleasure working for you, captain!"
Gimli: "Look at all the pretty flowers..." |
Rosie: *to Sam* "So, you destroyed the Dark Lord. That don't impress me much."
Eomer: "Hey, he got Arwen, the other dude got Eowyn, and I have...I have...I demand a re-write!" Vision in the palantir: "Hi, this is a courtesy call from Windlord Airlines, and we're just dying to tell you about our new Minas Tirith-Rivendell roundtrip discounts!..." |
Neat, Estelyn - I hadn't realized Ioreth's Kinswoman was a mini-celebrity [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]. All I can say is, Ioreth is lucky I wasn't her kinswoman or she would have been hearing a lot more than that (after we got home, that is).
A few more... Ioreth's Kinswoman: Please, tell me more! Ioreth: Of course, it was King Elessar who really deserved the credit for using the Kingsfoil; you should ask him about it. Frodo: It's a pity Bilbo didn't kill him when he had the chance. Gandalf: Good point. Unfortunately it turns out he escaped before Thranduil got my message about arranging an "accident." Well, s**t happens. Saruman: WORMTONGUE! ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT YOU THREW OUT THE PALANTIR WHILE IT WAS WRAPPED IN MY *BLANKY*?!! Elrond: I will take the Ring, because I know the way - I've been there before, remember? Merry & Pippin OR Frodo & Sam: We are the Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name! |
Pippin: I am SOOO bored!
Eowyn: Yes, Aragorn, you're right. Eomer(to Eowyn): You know, Sis, Theoden IS getting kind of senile and useless, and we ARE next in line for the throne of Rohan.... are you thinking what I'm thinking? Elrond: I don't know. Gandalf (to Gollum):Now really, think about it, you're almost a hobbit, and what kind of a life is this for someone like you, really, sneaking around Middle Earth, occasionally getting caught and/or tortured, obsessing over this stupid piece of jewelery... Maybe you should consider what you REALLY want. Gollum: Yesssss, the nassty wizard hass a point, preciouss, yes, we thinks he does. (Moves to the Shire, marries a nice hobbit-maid, and lives happily ever after.) [ March 09, 2002: Message edited by: Belin ] [ March 25, 2002: Message edited by: Belin ] |
Gandalf to Frodo: I'm not going to lie to you frodo every Man and Dwarf who fought a Nazgul has died. I've seen them punch through mithril. Elves have emptied entire quivers at them and hit nothing but air. Where they have failed you will succeed. There strength is based on wraith-world and because of that they will never be as strong or as fast as you can be.
Frodo: Are you saying I can dodge arrows? Gandalf: I'm saying when the time comes you won't have to. (this is only funny if you've seen The Matrix) |
ringwraiths at an airport
speaker: flight 333 with the ringwraiths will depart in 5 minutes. leader: run run or well miss our flight |
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