Sauron does his best impression of Galadriel when she gets too excited. (ie. Mirror of Galadriel from movie.)

OR

This is Sauron's twin. Sauron's the bad one, in case you didn't know. :rolleyes:

OR

Sauron has some major buck teeth.

OR

Sauron: "Oh, look, a lever! I wonder what it does?" *pulls lever* *gets electrocuted*

OR

101 Ways To Defeat a Dark Lord
#37- attach him to an arc welder.

Voiceover: Taking over Middle Earth. Just one more thing you can't do whilst being electrocuted.

The Maitre D'...
 

"And finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin mint."

It was a well known, but amazingly well kept secret that sauron was known to taking to life-like mall christmas decor to boost holiday season support...


~ Aesthete

Frodo: *sigh* He ate the phial...again :(

Sauron had his fingers cut off in the midst of pulling splinters out of him.
(that would explain the tweezers in his left hand...)

Are those feline or canine facial features?

Sauron? Yes, that is what they used to call me, Sauron the black. I am Sauron the White, and I come back to you now at the turn of the tide.

(Pippin with a pale of water)

Pippin: Wonder what happens when I do this. *throws water on Sauron*

Sauron: I'm melting... melting..... MELTING!!!!!!
(little orcs run out around the now melting Sauron singing HI HO the witch is dead the wicked wicked witch is dead)
Sauron lets out a final cry as he turns into a rainbow lollipop.

Pippin: Hey look Merry a pretty lollipop. Wanna lick?

----------OR----------------

Sauron runs out of dark tower singing and dancing.

Sauron: Ebony and Ivory live together in perfect harmony.......

Sauron spent too long on the sun-bed.

OR

Sauron the black, uncloaked.

I don't know why but this came to mind(wonder what froid would say...)

Sauron: Behold I am the great Sauron
Beavis(yes random):Really cool but I am the Great Cornholio
S:But Im better
B: Do you have TP?
S:.....uh....no
B:Than you su-- for I am the great cornholioooooooooo

or(another less random one)

Sauron:Let me get this straight Gandalf glows and all of a sudden he's mighty...but if i glow im dieing....dude thats messed up

After killing Sauron, the men of Gondor turned him into Pelagir's first human lighthouse

Sauron: What? What do you mean this set isn't for the Dragonball Z live-action movie try-outs?

---------
Later
---------

Sauron: How could I not get the part? How?! I can do the glowy effects thing without the need for expensive visuals! *weeps*
Elrond: It's okay...you'll get other jobs...
Sauron: Easy for you to say, Agent Elrond....*muttering* jerk...

Emperor Palpatine: If you will not turn, then you will be destroyed!
Frodo: Noooooooooo!!! *incoherent gargling* Help me Sauron, please!
Darth Sauron: *hesitates, grabs Palpatine*
ZZZZZZAAAPPPPPP!!!!!

going off of arcticstorm:

Frodo: But you're evil.

Sauron: I know that!! I mean at the turn of the tide for my victory!!! Can't you all get that through your heads!?!?!? What? Did you think I'd turn into Gandalf and help defeat myself!?!? Sheez!!!

So this is why you should never smoke, kids.

Excuse the gamer-nerdiness...
 

"Curse you and your Mirror Shield!"


(Anyone who gets this is my new best friend.)

As one of the most powerful of the Maiar, Sauron's hickups were much more lethal!

And from the bowels of Sauron bursts forth a new picture!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...s_stampede.jpg

Ring wraiths: RUN AWAY! Fury bunny rabbit! :eek:

OR

R-Ws: Run Away! Gandalf the Grey! Uncloaked!

Or yet!

The Ring wraiths were not happy with the service at Burger King!

Or further,

Witch King: Who put jam on my seat?

Here's a twist
 

Witch-King: We found our way to Rivendell!! Yes!!

Ring Wraiths: Hurray for MapQuest!!!!

*meanwhil in Rivendell*

Arwen: Father!! The Black Riders crossed the Fords!!!

Aragorn: I knew I should have gone instead of her!!

Gandalf: That surprised me so much, I think I'm going to uncloak!!

Elrond: I hate MapQuest!!! :mad:

Legolas: Hey!! Look!! Aragron's here!! And the Black Riders are coming!! And Gandalf's uncloaking!!! And Elrond hates MapQuest!!!

Everyone: :rolleyes:

Invisible minstrels:

Bravely the bold Ringwraiths
Rode forth from Mordor...
They were not afraid to die,
O the brave Ringwraiths
They were not at all afraid to be killed in ways...

Witch King: Attack! Attack! Oh! Wait! Catastrophe!

Khamûl: What is it?

Witch King: I left the iron on! We'll have to turn back!

Or

W-k *to Eowyn*:Come not between the Nazgul and his pray! Hay! Come back here I'm not finished!

Contrary to popular belief, the Wraith's steeds could run on water.

The polo game wasn't going too well.

Not invisible minstrels...but Ringwraith Minstrels...

Ringwraith Minstrels: Brave Sir Witch-king ran away...
Witch-king: No!
R M: bravely ran away away...
W-K: I didn't!
R M: When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.
W-K: Shutup!
R M: Yes, brave Sir Witch-King turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out.

Or...

The Ringwraiths enjoy a game of Ding-dong Doorbell ditch.

Seven Ringwraiths in Back: Kill the imposters!

Two Ringwraiths in Front: I knew we should've gotten black horses.

Sauron pic:

Sauron: "I am Melkor returned, worship me and you will have plenty of man-flesh to eat! No more crow!"

Nazgul pic:

The Nazgul were late for their flight to Bohemian Grove.

Ring-wraiths: "Weren't we riding Black Horses?!"

OR

The wraiths enjoy a stress relieving game of polo.

OR

The Ring-wraiths in front just can't help but look back at their super-cool flowing cloaks.

OR

It's the newest craze in the sporting world! Synchronized Water Horse-Racing! Only on ESPN 8, the Ocho!

Clearance sales at the Gap of Rohan always brought the undesirables of society.

Witch King: Tch! I knew I should've asked what the others were wearing to the halloween party!

Witch-King: Couldn't they have cancelled the polo game when they knew the hurricane was coming??

Ringwraiths: Ahh, the next Picture...Gandalf! He's going to uncloak...

http://www.warofthering.net/quintess...lbo_bagend.jpg

Gandalf: Now, you are going to give the Ring to Frodo?

Bilbo: Yes of course (thinks)...he, he, the fake one.

Bilbo: *between teeth* Can I please stop smiling now? It's starting to hurt.
Gandalf: Not until you learn what it'd be like if your face was stuck like that. This will teach you not to play tricks using that Ring of yours.
Bilbo: But, it hurts...
Gandalf: Don't make me uncloak...

Gandalf: So then I uncloaked and the Balrog got scared and he fell!!!!

Bilbo: That's hil... you WHAT!?!?!?!?!?

Gandalf: It's your own fault Bilbo, I tried to warn you. I said you'd be stuck like that if the wind changed and look what happened!

Narrator's voice: Bilbo drank too much ale and almost spilled the beans about the Ring to his guests. Fortunately, Gandalf was quick on the uptake to warn him. Once again, the day was saved by the wise wizard, only drawback being, Gandalf was drunk himself and missed, kicking Bilbo in his privates instead of merely treading on his foot...

Bilbo: Ouch....
Gandalf: What? Ah...um...yes.. Alas! It was this accursed boot that gave the pain. Few now have the skill in healing to match such evil weapons, you must go to Rivendell, for only Elrond can heal you!
Bilbo: m-mm-mm-m...
Gandalf: No 'm-m' ing required, you must go at once!

Narrator's voice: And that's how Gandalf the Wise helped to rekindle Bilbo's passion for traveling and helped the Ring into Frodo's keeping! This is also the reason why Bilbo remained bachelor to the end of his days, for even Elrond's skill was not match enough, as Bilbo's somewhat damaged walking ability took him more than an year to reach Rivendell and it was too late... ahem, you know how it hurts when...ahem, but I'm straying... And they lived happily ever after, they did, yes!

The trickster Hobbit had poured Ex-lax in Gandalf's tea...

Gandalf: Mmmm, good tea.

Bilbo: Yes, drink up.

Plotting their little joke
 

Gandalf: Okay then after the party we'll act like you have left, then I'll give Frodo your "special ring". Later I'll become convinced it's the one ring and send him on some wild goose chase to destroy the ring.

Bilbo: Do you think he'll believe it's the one ring?

Gandalf: Of course he will, he believes anything I say.

Little did Gandalf the Grey know that Bilbo Baggins set his staff aflame...

Bilbo:So then I says.....
Gandalf(speaking):Really? fascinating
Gandalf(thinking):So I was able to send this guy off and no one cared I wonder if anyone would noticed if he was gone forever.....eru! does he ever stop talking?
Bilbo(continuing):Then I was totally p-oed and I says.........
Gandalf(scratching into table):Redrumredrumredrum