Fortunately, these particular hobbits' regeneration powers allowed them to regrow their feet.

Fortunately, hobbits can hide better than Melkor can seek.

Unfortunately for Melkor, the new hobbit
feet proved adept at kicking around orcs and
bad valar.

Fortunately, Melkor's sick experiments were thwarted when Ulmo decided to flood his strongholds.

Unfortunately, Manwe got mad at Ulmo for doing all the work.

Fortunately, Ulmo didn't care, because Eru liked him more than Manwe.

Fortunately, Ulmo didn't care about Manwe's wrath, as soon as Manwe saw that Ulmo didn't care, Manwe got over it.

(Unfortunately, there was too much x-posting on this thread)

Fortunately the massive x-posting leads to a system overload which causes all of Arda to blow up and we return to the beginning...

Gimli is hungry

Unfortunately, everything must happen the same way and Gimli wants to go after the fish that Gollum wants.

Fortunately, there is no hair/hare confusion this time.

Unfortunately, even though there is not confusion about hair/hare, there was a confusion about the rabbits.

Fortunately, a huge dragon appeared.

Unfortunately, the dragon ate the rabbits...

Fortunately, the rabbits were evil, so everyone was happy.

unfortuately the rabbits' evil souls gained possession of the dragon

Fortunately suddenly a red arrow entered the dragon's
stomach and killed the dragon and the evil rabbits souls.

Unfortunately, the souls meshed together into an even more monstrous beast.

Fortunately for Middle-earth Gollum was very hungry
and ate the monstrous (fish) beast.

Unfortunately, Gollum now grew in size and was possessed by the evil souls.

Fortunately, the evil souls which now possessed Gollum noticed how it was their shortness which had made them so mean -- being laughed out all those years by the bigger, more hunky souls will do that to you!-- and they decided to change their after-lives for the better and do some good!

Unfortunately, that was the moment someone decided to throw an apple at them.

Fortunately, Roac just happened to be flying by and got hit by the apple instead

Unfortunately the apple flew off and hit Beorn
(and it's not wise to tick off Beorn). :eek:

Fortunately, Beorn was sleeping and the apple didn't wake him.

Unfortunately, it bounced off Beorn and hit an angry Warg.

Fortunately Treebeard then caught the apple
and squished the angry warg.

Unfortunately angry wargs never travel alone, in fact they like to travel in packs of 1,200

Fortunately, the other 1,199 wargs were busy doing 1,199 different things and did not notice the bouncing apple, nor the squishing of their friend until Treebeard was far away.

...Mind you it must have been 1,199 very involved things considering the time that must have elapsed.

Unfortunately all those 1,199 different things had something to do with terrorizing hobbits

Fortunately, they all caught a rare disease.

Unfortunately, they were able to purchase cures
from BIll Ferny's cutrate drug emporium:

"Come on down to Friendly Bill's.
Our Prices Are INSANE!"

Fortunately the Arda Drug Administration raided Ferny's Fharmacy, because none of his drugs were ADA approved, and the wargs couldn't get their cure

Unfortunately, the ADA failed to arrest Ferny, therefore, he set up shop once again.

Fortunately, Ferny got attacked by rabid wargs.

Unfortunately for them, the wargs died after they bit
Bill Ferny (Bill, of course, was fine).

Fortunately for the wargs, one warg lived and ran off to get the ADA to raid Bill's new shop.

Unfortunately a mutated Orcish archer shot the ADA enforcer with a spiked arrow.

What's the "ADA"?

Tuor, the Arda Drug Administration...completely made up a few posts back. :D
Continue... :)