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Galadriel: I think i'll make some potatoe salad in my mirror
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Legolas in the Battle of Helms Deep:
Everybody was Kung Fu fighting! huh! *stabs orc* Those cats were fast as lightening! huh! *stabs orc* It was a little bit frightening... Gandalf: I'm too sexy for my robes... The entire fellowship: *around the campfire singing* Kumbya my Lord, Kumbya... Gimli: Everyone...I'm gay! Saruman: *looks into palantir* Yes, um, can please have a large cheese pizza, a diet coke, and an order of breadsticks please? Twenty minutes? Ok thanks... [ April 22, 2003: Message edited by: Daewen ] |
Sam quoting anything from Shakespeare or Albert Einstein equations, or pretty much anything else that might be considered 'higher learning'. Not that I don't think he could if he wanted to...after all, Bilbo did learn him his letters.
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HEY!, the Kung-fu fighting was my post!
THIEF!!! |
sorry...it was really good....
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Elrond: Right so I was like, dude and he was all like, dude and then we're both all like, dude...
Frodo: Cool, a giant spider! That's one more for the exotic instect scavenger hunt. Legolas: Life is pain highness...anyone who tells you differently is trying to sell you something... Gimli: *watching a Walk to Remember* *sniff* Oh my gawd, he married her! Aww...how romantic...*sob, grabs tissue* Legolas: I'm an Elf! I'm in Elf in tights! I roam around the forest looking for fights! I'm an Elf...an Elf in tights...tight tights... *I hope you've all seen a Knights Tale...* Aragorn: Grr...you're just a silly girl! Arwen: Better a silly girl with a flower than a silly boy with a horse and a stick. *walks away* Legolas:...It's called a sword, hello... |
*~*C'mon people let's keep this thing going*~*
Gimli: Voulex vou couche avec moi... Aragorn: Hit me baby one more time! |
*imagines Gandalf at the front yelling orders as they travel*
Gandalf: "Foward, March!" Gandalf: "I don't know but I've been told," The Fellowship: 'repeats' Gandalf: "Saruman is really old," The Fellowship: 'repeats' Gandalf: "He's a traitor yes he is," The Fellowship: 'repeats' Gandalf: "Now I am the Mighty Wiz. Sound off! T.F. "One, Two," Gandalf: "Sound off" T.F. "Three, Four," Gandalf: "Bring it on up now" T.F. "One, Two, Three, Four,..One..Two ThreeFour!" Yavanna to Aule: "Go ahead honey cut down the old ones first!" [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] Thats all the time I have, sorry if you didn't think it was funny. My jaw hurts as well!! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] I like Aragorns "I am a mondern Major General!!LOL This thread is really Fun!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] ~(~<~> Yavanna |
Wargs approach, just before the Fellowship gets to Moria's gate.
Legolas: Screams like a girl, tosses away his bow, picks up his skirts and runs. Rest of the Fellowship: And why did we bring him again? See my sig. as well. |
Isildur: I think I'll throw this ring into Mount Doom
Sauron: Who cares about the one ring? Not me! Eowyn: I'll just stay home and make Eomer some new clothes Sam: Yes, Gandalf, I was eavesdropping |
Daewen, I love the Knights Tale thing!! LOL
The Elf in tights thing is really funny too! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] How about this ( Another Matrix parody) Elrond: Come with us Mister Greenleaf Leglolas: The Name IS LEGO!! [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img] Nah, that was dumb. Let me try again. A long long time ago: Deagol is eating a box of cracker jacks and picks out a ring and Gollum takes it from him. the 2nd age Frodo is eating a box of cracker jacks, pulls out another One ring. Frodo: Wow, hey Uncle Bilbo looky what I found! Bilbo, upset and astounded, rushes over to compare the two. Bilbo : I don't believe it! Sam comes bumbling up the walk to Bag End, pops his head in the window and with a mouth choc-full-o cracker jacks and exclaims,'Miffer Frodo, Loo wha I found!', as chewed carmel covered pop corn hits Bilbo's face. Bilbo inspects Sams ring as well. Bilbo: They are just cheap imitations. Gollum sitting in the woods he is so fat he looks like a bloated frog with a humongous pile of empty cracker jack boxes on one side and a giant pile of One rings in front of him. Gollum: Ohh yessss, we have the Preciousesss now don't we. Yessss we has the preciousesssss. Because preciousss has had babiesss yess. [ April 27, 2003: Message edited by: Yavanna Kementari ] |
Here are some more...
Aragorn: It's a bird, it's a plane, it's an eggsalad sandwich... Bormir: No you idiot... Both: It's Captian Underpants!!! |
Denethor: "Hey Faramir! Let's have a father/son bonding moment! You get the gasoline, I'll get the matches!"
Turin: I'm happy! I'm happy in my marriage, I'm happy in my life, I'm happy in my job! HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! Peter Jackson: *Arwen* in the movie? ARWEN? Are you insane?! |
Gandalf is on top of Orthanc in the evil clutches of Saruman, bringer of all things Fluffy and Special. Suddenly a moth flies straight towards him.
Gandalf: "Arrggh! A moth!!!" (squish!) |
Ted Sandyman: I want to hear more about Sam, dad. Why didn't they put in more of his talk, dad? That's what I like, it makes me laugh. And Frodo wouldn't have got far without Sam, would he, dad?
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Lol, stickifinger! Still laughing...
Sam: "The sum of the square of the right triangle is equal to the legs of the hypotnuse." Fro: Yah, who cares about the ring? Let's go home and WASH SOME WINDOWS!! Woohooo!! Quote:
Legolas: Uh, no wait that's 99 bottles of Beer on the Wall! Frodo: That is his lament! Pippin: *sniff* That was his favorite song..." [ May 06, 2003: Message edited by: Oddwen ] |
Frodo: I see dead people
Sam: We all do you stupid mofo! Frodo: What the hell is your problem? Sam: That I am stuck up with you. I don't know why I am still here. Frodo:You're father tolled you to! Sam: Ahw screw him. What does he know? Sam walks of swearing. |
Legolas: Charlie's Angels! Please save us!!
Merry: Ale increases your character. Pippin: I agree Meriadoc, did you know that when you drop things down wells they make noise. |
Lol- Sauron: the ring is just to pretty for me to have-lets donate it to the Save The Elves fund!
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Aragorn: C'mon baby let's paint the town...and all that jazz! (hope you guys have seen Chicago. Good movie, but it shouldn't have beat TTT for best film...there was NO plot!!!)
Gandalf: D00 j00 5p34l< 1-14x00r? Saruman: And as the Chairman of the Middle Earth Greenpeace Organization I would just like to announce that we are donating $5,000 to help maintain Fangorn Forest! Treebeard: C'mon hurry up. |
Gandalf: I cant believe Sauron has goten so far. I look up to him!
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Quote:
Elrond: SMILE!! You’re on candid camera! Arwen: Git lost, Aragorn! Who would want a scruffy man when I can have…*sighs dreamily*…..Legolas…. Aragorn: Where did you say the soap was? I’d like to have a bath so Arwen will love me again. *sniff sniff*. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Tom Bombadil: *Groans* …Hmph..… I REALLY don’t feel like singing right now. A break, please? Please? Gimli (in the Mines of Moria): Eeeewww! What a wreck this place is! OK, for my first go, wasn’t it? OK, maybe I’m being vain but anyway! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Take care, eh? Tarien Ithil |
Boromir: 'What is this new devilry?'
Gandalf: 'Weasels! Ancient weasels running up and down your legs and int your pants! Weasels, I tell you!' Pippin: 'Actually, just leave it, I'm not that hungry.' Gimli: 'Ooh, a pink axe? Yes please.' Sam: 'Cheerio, Frodo.' Aragorn: 'I never wanted to be King of Gondor, I wanted to be... a lumberjack! Leaping from tree to tree as they float down the River Isen!' Elrond: 'Anyone fancy a belching competition?' Galadriel: 'Let's go round the back of the tree for a ***, Frodo.' |
Tom Bombadil: Faster you miserable cretins! *whips Hobbits with the Cat O'Nine Tails*
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Eomer, what is this apparent undying fascination with the cat o' ninetails that you have? Haha!
Gollum: 'Half a bee, philosophically, must ipso facto half not be. But half a bee has got to be vis a vis its entity. But can a bee be said to be or not to be an entire bee, when half the bee is not a bee, due to some ancient injury?' Sam: Sucks quizzically on pipe whilst furrowing his brow. 'An interesting point you raise, my dear Smeagol. And one which must be addressed, I feel. Now, it's as my old gaffer would say: Half a bee is, despite being only half of its origonal entity by its very morphological definition only half of what it should be, and therefore half a bee is half a bee.' Frodo: 'But my dear Samwise, you have forgotten the argument of the teleologist. This "ancient injury" of which Gollum...sorry, Smeagol, speaks would surely, by teleological thinking, have happened for a purpose, in order that the task which this half a bee- we shall call him Eric- has been appointed with may be fulfilled. By this reasoning the bee, despite being "Eric the half a bee" by the morphological definition, is by teleological reasoning an entire bee for the purposes of fulfilling his long-appointed task. Your thoughts, Master Smeagol?' Gollum: 'I'll be honest with you, I was quoting Monty Python and am just bored now. You got any fish?' |
Now that you've called me 'Eomer' I just feel very strange now! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
Also, nice Denis Law reference! If we can continue the 'Only an Excuse' theme; Aragorn: Faur's the birds? (for all you non-Scots, this loosely translates as "Could you please tell me the whereabouts of the fair, young women?") |
Haha! There are too many!
Gandalf: At the Black Gate, realising The Ring has been destroyed 'Shockarooney!' Nice Scots translation, by the way, Burns himself would have been proud. |
*Just outside Fangorn Forest, Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli are resting for the night.*
Gimli: What was that noise? Did you see that shadow move? And where is that bloody Elf?!?!? Aragorn: Shhh.*whispers* Over there, in the forest, do you see that light? *Gimli nods* Aragorn: *gets up* come, master Gimli, and have your axe at the ready. *Pushing aside some branches, they come to a small clearing in the woods. Legolas is in purple,silk pajamas, looking into an oversized mirror he stuck onto a tree. He looks at his two companions, who are standing dumbfounded, then goes back to rebraiding his hair.* Legolas: Well, you cant expect me to go around looking like you people! And why didnt you TELL me I had a smudge on my forehead the WHOLE TIME we were running here? And in front of Eomer too... Sorry it's so long winded, heres a shorter one: Frodo: Why does Gandalf alway wear grey? Aragorn: Meddle not in the affairs of Saruman, for he is quick to put black socks into your whites |
Quote:
"Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something." [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] Kudos for using that quote...Princess Bride is my second favourite movie. <font size=1 color=339966>[ 1:02 PM January 16, 2004: Message edited by: Ainaserkewen ] |
"Frodo: Why does Gandalf always wear grey?
Aragorn: Meddle not in the affairs of Saruman, for he is quick to put black socks into your whites." Roflmao!!!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Eomer: "I would cut off your head, dwarf; if only it stood a little higher from the ground." Gimli: "Oh really? You and what army?" Argghhh, that was lame. [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img] |
Pippin: I'm out of Bacardi Breezers. Merry, get me a Bailey's.
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King Theoden: At Helm's Deep 'Oooh, there's rather a lot of them, isn't there. Gamling, pass me the white flag.'
Gimli: 'Make mine a mineral water. Sparkling, please.' Aragorn: While running across the plains of Rohan 'My feet hurt, I haven't slept in days and I really need to go poo. Who cares about Merry and what's-his-name? It's not like they've even got The Ring.' Aragorn: 'Sphinkters say what.' Elrond: 'What?' Gandalf and Aragorn laugh at Elrond's stupidity. |
Pippin: Aragorn is eight feet tall. And if he were here, he'd blast the Uruks with lightning bolts from his eyes, and thuder bolts from his arse! | Braveheart, a wonderful movie. |
... Pippin and Merry: But the only brew for the brave and truuuuue, comes from the Green Dragon! Gandalf: So that's why all the rum's gone. | PotC! Yay! | ... Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas bowing before the mysterious White Wizard at Fangorn... Aragorn: You killed my Gandalf!! The White Wizard: No, Aragorn, I AM your Gandalf. Aragorn: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! |
Eowyn to Witch-King: Your mother wore combat boots!
Witch-King: My mother was a saint! Eowyn: ........... |
Gandalf (before the Doors of Durin): Umm... guys... now would be a bad time to tell you that I left my copy of Everything you want to know about Middle-earth (and Passwords too!) back in Rivendell, right?
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Sauroman: "There will be no dawn for men."
Grima: "PROVE IT!!!!!!!!!" [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] |
These are so great!!
Here are mine. I don't think they are great, but I hope they are funny enough for your liking everyone! Frodo: Where are we? Sam: Who knows? Let's just toss the ring in the ditch and go back to the Shire. Frodo: Okay Gandalf: You are by far the worst ring bearer I have ever heard of. Frodo: But you have heard of me Pippin: We've been drinking too much Merry: Maybe we should enter the Alcholics Annoymus group. Arwen: Who are you? Aragorn: The man you love. Arwen: Which one? Aragorn: Do you see what I see? The Fellowship: A star, A star, high above the trees, with a voice as big as the seas. With a voice as big as the seas. Gimli: This is my home Gandalf: I've never seen pink dwarf walls before Gimli: They are the newest fashion in Gondor Aragorn: Got your weapons? Gimli and Legolas: Yep Aragorn: Got your water bottles? G & L: Yep Aragorn: Need to go to the bathroom? G & L: Yep Aragorn: Then go Legolas: I didn't really, just forgot how to say no Orcs: I can't stand all this blood, let's go to the mall I don't know about these, I think they are funny, but let me know! |
Very good, Crystal Heart! I especially like the Frodo: 'But youhaveheard of me!' Hehe! Welcome to the Downs, by the way. May your soul struggle here for many years! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
Merry: 'Phew, I'm tired.' Pippin: 'Yeah, let's just turn in for an early night, eh. just stay out of trouble.' Legolas: 'Another drink, Gimli?' Gimli: 'No thanks.' |
Don't know if anybody's said something like this yet:
Aragorn: Hmm... maybe the "I just washed my hair in bacon fat" look isn't really working for me.... ^Yes, rather boring, I know... I only posted this so my postings would go up.... plus I'm in school right now (supposed to be typing an essay!) and am really bored. ~Caitlyn [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] |
This is an Awesom thread!
Fangorn: Hello Saruman, I brought you a present, they call themselves "hobbits" I thought you'd have some use for them. Saruman: Wow, just what I always wanted! Oh by the way can you come over for tea next week? Fangorn: Sure anytime. Oh and by the way, if you ever need wood, my forest isat your disposal. Gollum: Massster, we could help you carry the Preciousssss. Frodo: Okay here you go, it's been rather heavy lately. Denethor: Gandalf, so good to see you, any chance you have found the long-lost heir of Isildur? Gandalf: as a matter of fact, yes. Denethor: How splendid! Sauron: I wish I had eyelashes. Denethor: And know I shall burn myself and my son alive. Pippin: Are you sure you want to do that? Denethor: On second thought, burning myself really isn't a very good idea. Or Pippin: Great idea, can you burn me to? Sam: Gollum, if you ever get the ring back will you give me the Shire to be my own personel garden? Gollum: Okay, nice hobbit. (Gandalf changes Theoden back into a human beingin TT) Theoden: My beutiful wrinkles, what did you do with them! Change me back, NOW! Saruman after gathering his huge army: You know, maybe I shouldn't take over Rohan... Gandalf on Orthanc when Gwaihir shows up: Ugh, you again, couldn't some other eagle come to rescue me. Sauron: Really, what's the point of a big scary eye without eyelashes... |
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