Fortunately Bilbo donated cases of Old Winyard
to the cause.

Unfortunately it all burnt on the way.

Fortunately Strider provided Bilbo with
medicinal leaves that countered the
damage to the burnt wine.

Unfortunately all the alcohol in the wine had already evaporated.

Fortunately, the smell was still there.

Unfortunately, they could not drink the smell.

Fortunately, they could smell the drinks (that were being shipped from Carn Dum)

Unfortunately the Witch King put in
prohibition in Angmar to keep his
orcs sober.

Fortunately the Barrow-Wights came to sort out all the problems!

Unfortunately Barrow-Wights are notoriously
sloppy drunks (especially the Wine of Dorwinion).

Fortunately, the Barrow-Wights were not drunk at the time.

Unfortunately, they were at that particular moment.

Fortunately, at the time of the moment that the last post was written wine fell from the sky like rain and grew little wine trees!

Unfortuantely their fruits were poisonous

Whooo! 1000 posts!
 

Fortunately, they were all immune.

Unfortunately, the giraffes weren't.

Fortunately, the giraffes werent there to give a care. (Yay, rhymes)

Unfortunately, many horses were.

Fortunately, horses and giraffes are not the same.

Unfortunately, this didn't stop them being there.

Fortunately, Mount Zoom ran over
all of them.

Unfortunately they were still alive

Fortunately the horses and giraffes were all scared
by lions and tigers and bears (oh my!)and ran off
to South Harad (a disputed land).

Unfortunately it was very dry in South Harad

Fortunately, Ulmo was sick on the land. And when he's sick, it's like a monsoon.

Unfortunately, Ulmo's monsoon-sick only occured in the North and didn't reach South Harad.

Fortunately, Ulmo could get sick again.

Unfortunately, he didn't want to get sick again.

Fortunately a nice cup of athelas tea
put everything right.

Unfortunately, the cup exploded afterwards.

Fortunately Trader Sharkey "Come on down to
Orthanc, our prices are INSANE!" was happy to provide
high quality tea cups at a reasonable price with
absolutely no (mwaaaaah) strings attached.

Unfortunately, these were magic tea cups that poison the drinker.

Fortunately the drinker had spent years building up an
immunity to iocane powder and so was unaffected by the poison.

Unfortunately the poison in the porcelain caused the drinker's hands to be burned.

Fortunately it was not porcelain at all, but stoneware.

Unfortunately, the stone they were made out of was chalk.

Fortunately this was dwarven chalk, their hardest mineral besides mithril

Unfortunately, the drinkers of the tea didn't know this.

Fortunately, Trader Sharkey did.

Unfortunately Trader Sharkey decided to outsource his supply
of chalk stoneware to Southron artisans, thereby driving the
thriving Hobbit stoneware industry into deep recession.