Unfortunately, the savage war between the Butterburs and the fierce but silent Watchers ended in a 40-year armistice before most of the Butterburs were wiped out in a surprise all-out attack by Watchers that had evolved to grow prodigious beards and provide travel accommodations.

Fortunately Brandybucks wiped out the Watchers
using Brandyhall attack submarines made from the
more noxious descendants of Old Man Willow and
directed by Saruman's cutting edge sonar technology.

Unfortunately, the attack submarines did a lot of collateral damage, destroying the old forest.

Fortunately Bombadil got his chum Johnny
Appleseed to replant the Old Forest.

Unfortunately this Johnny suddenly fell asleep.

Fortunately he got eaten by orcs (well, it was fortunate for them!:p)

Unfortunately that poor orc got sick..:(

(Once more, ran out of ideas..)

Fortunately Elrond was nearby and cured him
with a yummy green tea brewed from athelas.

Unfortunately Elrond never realized until too late it was an orc.

Fortunately the orc was a fan of Star Trek: The
Next Generation and considered Worf as a
role model, becoming a valued member of Rivendell's
TaRT (Truth and Reconciliation Taskforce).

Unfortunately, the elves of Rivendell were all Star Wars fans and beat the poor orc up, pausing at odd moments to make fun of Shatner.

Fortunately a Balrog appeared and joined the party!

Unfortunately, Mr Blobby also turned up and traumatized them all. The Balrog especially.

Fortunately, Tom Bombadil came to sort out this mess.

Unfortunately Goldberry called out
"Toga Party!" and invited everybody to
their house, except her ex-boyfriend (Haldir).

Fortunately the traumatized Balrog rejected the Toga Party.

Unfortunately everyone else joined in the fun.

Fortunately they didn't have much fun.. how unfutunate..

Psh:p

Unfortunately, they set fire to the house.

Fortunately it rained

Unfortunately, it didn't put out the fire and just made the floor wet.

Fortunately this made a great water slide
named "Waterloo" which was relocated
to San Dimas.

Unfortunately, since it was acid rain, the water was highly acidic.

Fortunately the ground was highly alkalinic, so when the acid hit it it became neutral.

Unfortunately, this took place in South Harad
and the water was all drunk by a herd of
thirsty Oliphaunts.

Fortunately it started raining. Woohoo!:p

Unfortunately it was raining cows.

Fortunately the cows landed on
and crushed the evil oliphaunts.

Unfortunately this benefited nobody, as the oliphaunts were already dead.

Fortunately it benefited the cows (although
they did become fearsome vampire cows).

Unfortunately the fearsome vampire cows immediately went in search for sustenance!

Fortunately a blancmange from the
planet Skyron in the Galaxy of Andromeda
turned all the cows into Scotsmen.

(A picture of Aragorn and his companions coming
to the relief of Minas Tirith as Scotsmen)!
(And Sauron as a blancmange)?

Unfortunately they didn't have Scottish accents.

edit: Now I'm the only member online :(

Fortunately the cows took a dvd
Rosetta Stone Program to become
proficient in a Scots accent.

(And lots of members and guests
came online to cheer up Eonwe ).

Unfortunately by the time the cows could understand the Rosetta Stone lessons, Scottish people were long gone and their accent was completely non-understandable. (is that a word? :p )

Fortunately (for them) the cows got bored reading
for Scots accents at Oxford (under a Professor Shippey)
[Shippey found their accents non-understandable] so
they went on a cow vampire pig-blood-sucking rampage
through The Shire. :eek:

Unfortunately the were allergic to pigs.

Fortunately (for the cows) they
weren't allergic to hobbits! :eek:

Unfortunately (for the cows) they couldn't digest hobbits.

Fortunately they could digest beer
and thoroughly trashed the Green Dragon
during their annual TOGA PARTY!