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-   -   What do you assign to Mordor? (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showthread.php?t=11894)

The Only Real Estel 10-15-2005 04:05 PM

Any art project that envolves much negative space or still art. :rolleyes:

Gandalf_the _white 10-16-2005 08:51 AM

I assign my younger brothers to Mordor, i'm sure they're in league with Sauron, they always wait till i'm just settling down to watch the LOTR movies or read the books and then they make loads of noise and i just can't concentrate, but i can't do a thing about it. :mad: :mad: :mad:

Orominuialwen 10-17-2005 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Only Real Estel
Any art project that envolves much negative space or still art. :rolleyes:

Any art project that involves soldering should go to Mordor too. I didn't realize just how hard it would be to solder such small pieces of metal when I designed my project. Also, pieces keep ending up in the wrong places, which means that I have to heat the metal until it's really hot (glowing dull orangeish-red) to try and move those pieces, only to realize once I've finished that other pieces have moved and I'll have to try and move those ones. It's looking quite likely that I'll have to solder three times now, which is annoying!

Edit: As of today, I have had to solder one particular piece back on four times. I am very annoyed.

the guy who be short 10-19-2005 01:46 PM

People who leave off those ever so handy essential parts of sentences, ie pronouns. Eg:

Man: Broke a leg?
Me: Um, no, I haven't actually. Why do you ask?
Man: No, I meant I broke my leg.
Me: Oh. *feels stupid*

Elonve 10-21-2005 03:03 AM

You know you think people are your friends and then you hear them talking about you behind your back... I send that to Mordor!
I also send people who make up roumers and gossip mongers!
________
SHIP SALE

Celebuial 10-21-2005 06:53 PM

I think we should send text books to Mordor...I had to buy three for my course this year and each one cost me about £40!!! Then you start to read them and realise that you don't understand any of it anyway, and that your lecturers aren't actually going to be using them directly and that there just there for reference incase you get stuck!!! Like I understand any of my course anyway!!!! I think that not only should they be assaigned to Mordor but that they should burn in the fiery chasm of Sammath Naur.

Feanor of the Peredhil 10-21-2005 07:10 PM

I send the inability to hold a standard to Mordor. We are adults. We sign on the dotted line going in debt for the rest of our lives to go to university. We are responsible for our actions. All this they drill into our heads, but as soon as our grades slip, even in just one class, they send a report of it to our parents? Way to treat us like adults responsible for our own lives.

*Fea grumbles about Uni a bit more before going away*

Celebuial 10-21-2005 07:23 PM

Actually why not just send in universities? We pay them stack loads of money for our education and yet they still don't seem to get it right! You get lecturers that drone on in a very soporific tone and you end up falling asleep... then you get the ones that just make their pHD students do all the work in Labs and exercise classes while they sit on their arse and check their e-mail. Oh and then there's allways those modules which they conveniently forgot to tell you were compulsory when you signed up... The list goes on and on....

Actually can we send in bad housemates too? The ones that live directly below your room and stay up all night smoking (not tobacco either) and playing loud drum and base music at four in the morning when you have a lecture at nine... the ones that use all your kitchen stuff and then don't wash it up... the ones that never answer the front door even though you have to walk down more flights of stairs and it's always for them anyway... the ones that spill guiness on your satin dressing gown and eat the last chocolate biscuit... I think they might get along great with all the orcs seeing as their behaviour is so similar...

Rune Son of Bjarne 10-21-2005 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Celebuial
Actually why not just send in universities?

It does not seem like a great idear.

I think you should assign the education system of whatever country you live in to Modor. Universities is not that bad in it self, but I might be influenced by the fact that the danish univerities are more or less free. . .

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fea
but as soon as our grades slip, even in just one class, they send a report of it to our parents

They do that!? They are wierd. . .

Cailín 10-22-2005 10:22 AM

Quote:

but as soon as our grades slip, even in just one class, they send a report of it to our parents? Way to treat us like adults responsible for our own lives.
I am now immensely grateful I chose not to study in the US.

I would like to send all students in my year who are smarter than me to Mordor, especially the ones gloating over it. Seriously, it's bad for both my ego and health and certainly not natural. :cool:

And bowling. I really don't understand why everyone has to go bowling all of a sudden.

The Only Real Estel 10-22-2005 06:51 PM

Spelling goes to Mordor as well, especially spelling on the Downs. Typically, I'm a good speller, but when it comes to spelling things like "Cailin" I have a hellish time for some reason. :eek:

Oddwen 10-23-2005 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cailín
And bowling. I don't understand why everyone has to go bowling all of a sudden.

NOOO!! Don't send bowling! Send rather the people whom you invite yet who don't show up when you invite them weeks in advance.

Glirdan 10-23-2005 06:52 PM

Quote:

NOOO!! Don't send bowling! Send rather the people whom you invite yet who don't show up when you invite them weeks in advance.
Completely agreed. I love bowling. I'm in a bowling league. I say we send the pins and the machines to Mordor. Well, maybe the pins can stay, but the machines must go!!

Cailín 10-24-2005 02:39 AM

All right, bowling may stay.

But how about leaking roofs and clogged toilets and untranslatable texts and busy trains and whining roommates and everything that can go wrong on a Monday morning...? :(

wilwarin538 10-24-2005 01:51 PM

Quote:

All right, bowling may stay.

But how about leaking roofs and clogged toilets and untranslatable texts and busy trains and whining roommates and everything that can go wrong on a Monday morning...?
Well of course those can go to Mordor. Just not bowling, cause bowling's cool.

I thought it sucked when my dad had to go to Philidelphia on Thanksgiving, well it'll suck even more if he has to go to Africa the week before Christmas. Again, to Mordor with whoever made that decision. :p

So ya. :rolleyes:

Gandalf_the _white 10-24-2005 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cailín
All right, bowling may stay.

But how about leaking roofs and clogged toilets and untranslatable texts and busy trains and whining roommates and everything that can go wrong on a Monday morning...? :(

Why not just send Mondays to Mordor all together? I hate Mondays!!! :mad:

Gothmog 10-25-2005 04:51 AM

Rune:
Quote:

It does not seem like a great idea.

I think you should assign the education system of whatever country you live in to Modor. Universities is not that bad in it self, but I might be influenced by the fact that the danish univerities are more or less free. . .
Agree! Universities, at least here in Sweden, should stay, but some teacher should take a trip to Mordor and take a hot bath in Orodruin... Also, all kinds of tests should be sent to mordor. And send those fees you have to pay (not me :) ) and the report-writing teachers (again, no problem for me) to some dark hole where they can think of what they have done...

And when I'm at it, send all these girls we'll never understand (=all girls) to mordor... on second thoughts, don't. Just give them a warning ;) I'm so tired of not knowing what she really wants :rolleyes:

And mondays..and sundays...

Glirdan 10-25-2005 05:31 AM

I send today to Mordor. I have TWO recitals to do at school today. TWO!!! GRRRRR!!!! :mad:

Lalwendë 10-25-2005 03:00 PM

I send traffic jams to Mordor. I had to get from Whitehall to St Pancras inside 30 minutes this evening and lo and behold, the police had a road closed off so the taxi driver had to get me there on two wheels (which he achieved without major incident ;) ).

Glirdan 10-25-2005 03:09 PM

I send people who practice parts for a week and do fine during them, but once it gets to show day, they go and almost throw you on the ground and make your head bounce off the stage during a Mortal Combat fight scene!! I send those to Mordor!!!! GRRRRR!!! :mad:

Formendacil 10-25-2005 03:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lalwendë
I send traffic jams to Mordor. I had to get from Whitehall to St Pancras inside 30 minutes this evening and lo and behold, the police had a road closed off so the taxi driver had to get me there on two wheels (which he achieved without major incident ;) ).

Should maybe send those taxi drivers to the Shire, eh? ;)

For myself, I'd also like to send bad traffic to Mordor. I was late for an doctor's appointment this morning, thanks to some bad traffic, and I was already in a less than happy mood about the whole affair thanks to a very early wake-up for it.

I'd also like to send the provincial road planners to Mordor. Why bother re-doing a highway and only widening the shoulders when everyone who drives on it says it needs another lane?

This is Alberta. If we can afford new pavement and wider shoulders, we could afford third lanes on our busiest highway...

Finally, I like to assign any Balrogs with Wings to Mordor simply because they don't belong in Moria or Angband. :D

Kath 10-25-2005 03:27 PM

I would like to send paranoia. Specifically my recently acquired paranoia about people online. One of my friends (who I only know via the net and not at all in real life since she lives in Manchester) wasn't online for a few days and I was just wondering where she was and it got me thinking, how would I know if she was hurt or something? What if she had been run over by a bus and killed? I would never know, all I would know is that she wasn't online anymore so I could surmise that something had happened to her but I would never really know. And then I thought that no, you would never know if someone you only knew via the internet died, because only they know their password to forums and instant messaging systems, and if they died suddenly then they wouldn't be able to tell anyone their password so we'd never know.

So yes I would like to assign that thought process that kept me awake all night and vaguely worried all day until said friend turned up on MSN this evening.

wilwarin538 10-25-2005 03:55 PM

Quote:

I would like to send paranoia. Specifically my recently acquired paranoia about people online. One of my friends (who I only know via the net and not at all in real life since she lives in Manchester) wasn't online for a few days and I was just wondering where she was and it got me thinking, how would I know if she was hurt or something? What if she had been run over by a bus and killed? I would never know, all I would know is that she wasn't online anymore so I could surmise that something had happened to her but I would never really know. And then I thought that no, you would never know if someone you only knew via the internet died, because only they know their password to forums and instant messaging systems, and if they died suddenly then they wouldn't be able to tell anyone their password so we'd never know.

So yes I would like to assign that thought process that kept me awake all night and vaguely worried all day until said friend turned up on MSN this evening.
Oh but I've thought ahead. ;) I've hidden a little note in my bedroom with my username and password for the 'Downs. That way if anything ever happens to me when whoever cleans out my room finds it they'll know to tell you guys.

But of course if I die because my house burnt down, that might not work. :p

EDIT: Just realised, if something does happen to me, Glirdy will tell you all. So no need for the note. :rolleyes:

And to stay on topic: I assign computer problems to Mordor.

littlemanpoet 10-25-2005 06:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Formendacil
Finally, I like to assign any Balrogs with Wings to Mordor simply because they don't belong in Moria or Angband. :D

Now you've done it! Just wait till the first Assigned to Mordor rpg starts up, and lo and behold, what do they find in Cirith Ungol, with no Grey Wizard to battle it for them? :eek:

Encaitare 10-25-2005 09:08 PM

Okay, maybe bowling gets to stay. But evil bowling alleys have to go. I swear, they have turned me off the game completely with their malfunctioning computers and unhelpful help.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lal
I had to get from Whitehall to St Pancras

I misread that as "St. Pancreas". :D

Lhunardawen 10-26-2005 03:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Formendacil
Finally, I like to assign any Balrogs with Wings to Mordor simply because they don't belong in Moria or Angband. :D

I just had a vision of The Saucepan Man, who is already in Mordor, pushing them out of the Black Gate.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Encaitare
I misread that as "St. Pancreas".

Great minds think alike. ;)

As for me, I send dying prematurely to Mordor. Not that I can blame the phantom for it; after all, he explicitly mentioned that in the rules. Nor do I blame my church for holding me off from the Downs (far it be from me!). But it seems to me to be for the good of Erbar Telamarth, as I was preparing a case against an ordinary villager before I was killed. :eek:

littlemanpoet 10-28-2005 09:16 AM

Announcement
 
The Assigned To Mordor (ATM for short) rpg is now in the planning phase. If you are interested, check this out.

If you want to "apply", so to speak, look through this thread and make a list of all the ways you've been "assigned to Mordor", and also make a list of all the things you've assigned to Mordor. Pick from these two lists what you want to have be part of your story. For more information, I direct you to the thread listed above. Hope to see you there! :)

Send a PM to me with your "application". First 4 to 7 approved, and we begin.

Edit: Since there have as of yet been no additional posts, I'll add this, which I forgot to say earlier: This is a Shire rpg; in order to play in any Shire rpg, you need to present a character at The Green Dragon Inn, and you need to read and familiarize yourself with the "Red Book of Westmarch" Shire rpg rules.

If you've already presented a character and read the Red Book, then you can go straight to "applying" to be a character in ATM. (Sure hope this takes off....)

littlemanpoet 10-29-2005 01:03 PM

I assign bad architecture and office rooms full of cubicles that make every worker feel like s/he's a creature in some kind of weird sci fi exhibit, aliens oohing and aahing over this or that example of the human species. (I need these for the rpg too, so there) :p

Celuien 10-30-2005 05:57 AM

Advertisements in general have already been sent to Mordor, but I want to make sure that a few specific pet-peeve commercials don't miss the dump truck heading to the Morannon.
  1. Commercials for weight-loss pills or exercise machines. They always seem to find to world's most obnoxious actors to be on the ads.
  2. Pharmaceutical company ads. You know it's getting ridiculous when someone is advertising a particular type of hip implant on TV.
  3. This commercial I heard on the radio the other day claiming that a certain company's fish oil supplement would cure high blood pressure and high cholesterol. But they didn't stop there. The ad went on to encourage everyone to stop taking their "liver damaging" medications for those conditions and take the all-natural oil instead. This isn't just a phony ad - substitute fish oil for snake oil - but dangerous if someone really decides to replace their meds with this product. Not that fish oil isn't good for you, because it is, but it's not going to fix these particular problems on its own. And all similar ads can go to Mordor along with this one.

*takes a deep breath*

I feel better now.

Lalwendë 10-30-2005 03:28 PM

I send to Mordor seaside rain. I suppose I couldn't guarantee sunshine in Whitby in October, but the minute we got there today it started pouring down, and a gale was whipping in off the North sea so that my hair went right up in the air like a three foot mohican. :mad: And there's only so much time you can spend in the pub/fish and chip restaurant/shops. Then when it cleared up it was so wet everywhere under foot I have salty tide marks on my boots and black feet from where all the water got in. It was also goth weekend, so there were hundreds of wet victorian undertakers about too; I always knew all those PVC coats and elevator boots had a more practical purpose. ;)

It was encouragingly English though. Nobody let the tempest stop them from eating ice cream and little trays of seafood, they just did it huddled in doorways. ;)

Eonwe 10-30-2005 03:53 PM

to build off Celuien:

marketing exectutive the world over. for:

1) selling us things we don't need
2) making things look cooler than they really are (i spent a fortune on toys i thought would be fun, but were really crappy as a kid)
3) getting people to buy things on credit, cuz that's just not smart

us: for being to gulible and stupid to resist buying things we don't need
thinking things are cooler than they really are
buying things on credit. ;)

the guy who be short 10-30-2005 04:19 PM

I send to Mordor people who randomly allocate blame to political correctness or bureaucracy. It's just plain daft when you see newspapers doing it (mind you, they are British tabloids).
E.g. Train prices rising? Bureaucracy gone mad!
Jamie Oliver's new school dinners? Political correctness!

I also assign sudden returns to school. My body won't want to wake up at 6:30 tomorrow. I can't make myself go to sleep at this absurdly early hour either. Sigh.

Orominuialwen 10-30-2005 11:44 PM

Go to Mordor. Go directly to Mordor. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.
 
I assign people who confuse you so that you can't tell what they mean by their actions. They do something that seems to mean one thing, but then they tell you something completely contradictory the next time you see them. (The best part about this is that I have told this particular friend of mine that he has been assigned to Mordor several times, so he knows it when he bugs me.)

To Mordor with pointless homework assignments. What my social studies teacher could possibly think I'll learn by writing down definitions of terms such as 'density', 'right of way', and 'water table' is beyond me.

Also, classes where homework isn't checked every day, but instead all the assignments for the unit are checked in the form of a quiz at the end of a unit. This can lead to major procrastination and is just a general pain.

The book Ethan frome also belongs in Mordor. **Spoiler** Any book where characters decide to commit suicide by sledding into a tree is just plain dumb.

When you get the vague uncomfortable feeling that your friend's parents see you as rather odd and look down on you because your family isn't quite as 'normal' as theirs is. :( That should never happen outside of Mordor.

Edit: All the people on my robotics team two years ago who didn't want to name our robot Oliphaunt, but then whined that they didn't like the name we ended up with (Epsilon) and complained that nobody had suggested any other names. I'm still annoyed about that more than a year and a half later.

Losing/misplacing things.

Fordim Hedgethistle 10-31-2005 10:43 AM

I consign to Mordor people who misuse the work assign.

*Fordim ducks flurry of heavy, pointed, objects *

Kath 10-31-2005 11:11 AM

Ah but Fordim we have already put nitpickers like yourself in Mordor!

I'll send going to the dentist. Especially when you just know the end result of such a trip will be a filling.

Hilde Bracegirdle 10-31-2005 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Orominuialwen
The book Ethan Frome also belongs in Mordor. **Spoiler** Any book where characters decide to commit suicide by sledding into a tree is just plain
dumb.


Oh, but I liked that book despite the ending. Sometimes things don't end up happily ever after. And besides, I don't think the orcs would get as much out of the story.

I consign building renovation where in cinder block must be sawed through, producing the same particular sound and chilling effect as a dental drill while one is trying to work, to the deepest, deepest depths of Mordor!

Celebuial 10-31-2005 12:49 PM

I'm gonna send grammer packing. English has always been my weak point (at school I did better at French and German), and I don't see why grammer is so important, if someone else understands what you mean surely that's enough for general everyday purposes. Then again it wouldn't do to have a book written with a sloppy use of grammer that would be annoying, and very confusing if english isn't your mother tongue... Ok, I'll refine my statement: I'm sending the overly pedantic use of grammer in eveyday conversation. I mean-you don't use grammer when leaving notes on the fridge, do you?

the guy who be short 10-31-2005 01:19 PM

Quote:

I mean-you don't use grammer when leaving notes on the fridge, do you?
You... don't? :eek:

I assign particularly difficult spellings, especially those which one can easily confuse. the -ent and -ant suffixes belong there, as do -ible and -able.

I also send maths lessons that take away my free periods, meaning I have to work for the whole day on Monday. That's just not a good way to start the week. :(

Celebuial 10-31-2005 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by the guy who be short
You... don't?

Well no... Normally it's just "get milk, n eggses" or "Who ate my tasty cheesecake that was enclosed yonder?" Though people don't tend to understand me... but that's just because I'm 'weird'

I totally agree with the evil spellings...

Anguirel 10-31-2005 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Celebuial
I'm gonna send grammer packing.

Celebuial, spelling and grammar have clearly formed an alliance against you-the one just saved the other from taking a trip to Mordor!

Pedantic teasing, sorry, had to be done...


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