Unfortunately, the excessive amount of "ring-a-dong-dillo"s caused the dog to die of annoyance.

Fortunately, the ring-a-dong dillos were frightened by the Morgo-yak, curled up into balls and rolled away.

Unfortunately the Morgo-Yak discovered AOL instant messaging.

Fortunately, Mount Zoom ran over his computer.

Unfortunately, the computer was more durable than Mount Zoom, and the latter cracked, and the crack grew wider until the moon could be seen through it; and then Mount Zoom plunged into the tarn.

Or something like that.

Fortunately, no one really liked Mount Zoom anyway.

Unfortunately, Mt. Zoom held the secrets of Life, the Universe, and Everything, and therefore had to be rebuilt.

Fortunately, Mount Zoom had somehow reassembled itself as it fell, and was now upside-down in the tarn.

Unfortunately, answers to such questions were found in Elrond's library that exact moment.

Fortunately someone who wanted to find the answers to these questions went to Elrond's library and used them to restore order to Middle-earth. :cool:

Unfortunately Elrond was angry because people used his library without asking first and he cursed them

Fortunately, Elrond was never known for his cursing ability, and ended up cursing Wormtongue instead.

Unfortunately, Wormtongue cursed him right back, turning him into an iguana.

Fortunately, it was always Elrond's dream to become an iguana.

Unfortunately, his recurring nightmare about being ran over by a car came true.

Fortunately, the books in Elrond's Library were donated to those who needed them; "How To Stay Clean On the Go" went to Aragorn, "Get Liked By the Fanbase" went to Legolas, "How To Not Look Like Plain Comic Relief" went to Gimil, "How To Not Steal People's Scenes" went to Arwen, "Filling Meals" went to Ungoliant, "How To Behave Like Actual, Likable People" went to the orcs, "How To Get Past Your Selfish Desires" went to Morgoth, "How To Use Your Brain" went to Sauron, "How To Not Look Dumb In Movies" went to Pippin, and "How To Stop People From Obsessing Over One Line" went to Gandalf.

Unfortunately, Frodo threw a tantrum because he didn't get a book.

Fortunately, then he got "How to widen your eyes in terror without looking wimpy."

Unfortunately, the book was cursed.

Fortunately, it was a "get horribly depressed" curse, which negated itself when it came into contact with Frodo's already existing horrible depression.

Unfortunately, it now made him EXTREMELY happy. :D :D :D

Fortunately, he was better able to handle the quest that way...though it was rather annoying to others.

Unfortunately, Frodo's laughter made the Orcs notice Sam and kill him.

Fortunately, Frodo was not killed and the quest could continue.

Unfortunately, THE DRAGON CAME!

...again.

Fortunately, the Dragon tripped over Barad-Dash, which lately has been constantly breaking down more and more...

Unfortunately, the Dragon also broke Mount Zoom, making it impossible for Frodo throw the Ring in.

Fortunately, Shagrat fixed Mount Zoom so Frodo could throw the Ring in.

Unfortunately by that time Frodo had lost the Ring.

Fortunately Sam was not that dead after all and had miraculously found the Ring.

Fortunately Sam, who was well used to picking up after his master, had found it.

(You didn't think a silly little thing like death would stop him, did you? cf Pratchett's Mr Slant)

Unfortunately, the Dragon ate Sam.

Fortunately Sam had some matches with him and so he made a fire inside the dragon causing him to let him go.

Unfortunately Sam was covered in dragon slime stench and no one wanted to be withing 49 feet of him.

Fortunately, this included the Orcs.

Unfortunately, this did not include the newly created orc race Uruk-smells-to-Hai-heaven

Fortunately they were tired of living under Sauron's oppression and decided to aid Sam in his quest.

Unfortunately, the ground suddenly gave way and they all fell into the abyss.

Fortunately, they have the miraculous Middle Earth characteristic of falling in to abysses and surviving

Unfortunately, they were all doomed to fall until they died of starvation.