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Witch_Queen 03-02-2005 09:27 AM

Cop: Freeze!

Gimli: But I didn't do it! I swear it was Legolas. Please don't put me in jail. I'm not young enough to go to jail.


5 minutes later in the back of a swat car: Policeman turns around to reveal that instead it is Ashton K.


Ashton: Gimli son of Gloin... YOU'VE JUST BEEN PUNKED!!!!

Feanor of the Peredhil 03-02-2005 09:46 AM

Gimli looks at Indigorn.

Orcs... very dangerous. You go first.

lord of dor-lomin 03-02-2005 09:59 AM

Raiders of the Lost Ark(enstone)
 
(Gandalf calls down to Gimli)

Don't just stand there! Put your axe in that hole on the tomb, fool of a Gloin! Then the sun will shine through it and show the exact location of the lost Arkenstone. I don't care if there's a big huge troll down there! (mutters) I should've asked Sallah to do this.

TPotSS 03-02-2005 10:27 AM

"I didn't ask for a skylight in this room!" Gimli yelled at Legolas.
"But I thought it needed one," Legolas protested as Gimli raised his axe. "It was so... undergroundish in here."
"That's because we ARE underground! And that's the way we dwarves LIKE IT! Balin would be rolling over in his tomb if he knew that some elf had added sunshine and sprinkled sparkly dust in his burial room!"

Evisse the Blue 03-02-2005 11:19 AM

Gimli: Turn around? There's a flying saucer behind me? Nice try!!

Eomer of the Rohirrim 03-02-2005 11:51 AM

Uh.....Pippin did it.

Nimrodel_9 03-02-2005 05:04 PM

Hi Ho! Hi Ho! It's off to work we go! ....... BALROG!!!!!!!

(I saw that in a comic strip once. I cut it out and still have it. :D )

davem 03-02-2005 05:16 PM

Gimli attempts (yet again) to lighten the mood by making funny shadow pictures on the wall of Ballin's Tomb...

'And if I hold my axe up like this it makes the shape of a Flamingo!'

Esgallhugwen 03-02-2005 09:59 PM

Gimli: Say Hello to my little friend!

Fingolfin II 03-03-2005 12:11 AM

They say Dwarves eat rocks, but Gimli went crazy looking for that last piece of chocolate cake.

Nilpaurion Felagund 03-03-2005 12:21 AM

Chucky in Moria.
 
Gimli realises that the box behind him is too small to fit a Dwarf in.

The top slowly opens . . .

Lalwendė 03-03-2005 03:06 AM

The police helicopter was scrambled when Gimli got his chopper out.

Nilpaurion Felagund 03-03-2005 03:25 AM

What's with microwaveable clothing?
 
Gimli didn't notice the "bottom" area of his clothes melting.

Maeggaladiel 03-03-2005 10:45 AM

Legolas- It's a bright white stone coffin illuminated by piercing blue neon! How can he NOT see it?! And I thought MEN were blind!

Eomer of the Rohirrim 03-03-2005 11:06 AM

Gimli's dilemma
 
Bloodthirsty Orcs? Portal to another dimension.....

What would my dad do?

Fordim Hedgethistle 03-03-2005 11:10 AM

Gimli

You put your right axe in,
You take your right axe out,
You hack the orc's head off,
And you shake it all about.
You do the hacky-slashy
And you turn yourself about.
That's what it's all about!

narfforc 03-03-2005 11:38 AM

Gimli, you are Glowingson, and are at the cutting edge of Dwarven Technology.

Garen LiLorian 03-03-2005 11:49 AM

That's right, ladies and gentlemen, for a mere 19.99$ you can be the proud owner of this amazing axe! Order now, and you'll also recieve this one of a kind special edition companion axe at no additional charge. Note the fine Dwarven craftsmanship as our lovely Gimlina shows off this one of a kind craftspiece. Order today!

Dial 1-800-Gimli-Axe Today!

Encaitare 03-03-2005 08:19 PM

Blatant Floyd Rip-off
 
Run to Balin's tomb, in the coffin on the left you'll find my favorite axe... Don't look so frightened, this is just a passing phase, one of my bad days...

Esgallhugwen 03-03-2005 08:38 PM

Narrator: Gimli, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsy pop?

Gimli: How should I know. I do know how many axe strikes it takes to get to the center of an orc though!

Nirvana II 03-03-2005 08:59 PM

cant...stop...transform---aaargh!


GIMLI SMASH!!!!

Nilpaurion Felagund 03-03-2005 09:50 PM

Blatant davem rip-off.
 
Gimli: Right, Bloom. That's the last time you call me Shorty.

Gurthang 03-03-2005 10:09 PM

A little gas...(again)
 
Gimili gives new meaning to the words a powerful fart. :eek:

And

Nobody had realized that Gimli had had cancer until all the radiation treatment that had been trapped inside him was suddenly released. :confused:

narfforc 03-04-2005 10:38 AM

Gimli: Kiss my Axe

Oddwen 03-04-2005 11:10 AM

And suddenly, Eru changed his mind about Elves, and bestowed his favor on the Dwarves. Legolas was not pleased.

Fingolfin II 03-04-2005 11:56 PM

Aragorn soon begins to realise that he shouldn't have told Gimli to 'Tear up the place' at his coronation...

Lhunardawen 03-05-2005 12:45 AM

After being enlightened at the Chapter-by-Chapter discussions, Gimli demonstrates to the rest of the Fellowship how Saruman breaks the light.

Boromir88 03-05-2005 09:13 AM

Gimli: Step up and see this new pic, it's really brought out in the light...

http://scd.mm-a.yimg.com/image/729390588
When I asked for a Black rider express delivery agent, I didn't mean for them to send NINE of them!

The Elf-warrior 03-05-2005 09:54 AM

People wondered how Harry the gatekeeper was able to afford a swimming pool on his gatekeeper salary.

Hookbill the Goomba 03-05-2005 10:22 AM

Harry: Hobbits!? Eight of them!?

Pippin: See, I told you Bree pipe weed was strong stuff!

Formendacil 03-05-2005 11:41 AM

Harry: "Wargs! Four Wargs!!! And out of the Chetwood by their talk!!"

Nimrodel_9 03-05-2005 02:24 PM

And again...
 
Harry sees Gandalf the Grey uncloaked. :eek:

HerenIstarion 03-05-2005 03:43 PM

Gimli pic:

Gimli: the director of this movie really likes stressing things, doesn't he? Putting strong accents, eh? In the book, I had an axe. Probably I polished it too, and called it by the name. Chaps in the books of the kind always do. Why the heck do I have three axes in this movie? I'm not surprised one of them is that rusty. I have two arms, after all, don't I?


Harry pic:

Harry has the latter brought by an owl post read to him by Barliman - the only lattered man for miles around. Harry Porter is invited to join certain school of witchcraft and wizardry...

Oddwen 03-06-2005 12:18 AM

Miracle Harry
 
Harry: Get out, or I'll call the Brute Squad!
Khamul: I'm onna Bchwute S'uad.
Harry: You *are* the Brute Squad!

Maeggaladiel 03-06-2005 02:03 AM

It is a little known fact that Harry the Gatekeeper originally tried out for the Blair Witch Project.

Gil-Galad 03-06-2005 08:42 AM

Tribute to Queen, the musical...of FOTR
 
Harry "I see a little silouhette of a hobbit"

Hobbits: Scaramouche,scaramouche will you do the fandango

Nazgul: Thunder Bolts and lightning very very frightening!

Harry: Gallieo! Gallieo! Gallieo Magnifico!

Eomer of the Rohirrim 03-06-2005 01:55 PM

Hard-luck Harry's list of things that went wrong...
 
#14 - Stepped on a thumbtack.

THE Ka 03-06-2005 03:46 PM

Harry: " What do you mean I can't join the Cynical Mucky Wet Door Men's Union!? I have an Attitude! See-"

The nasgul are sent in...

:)

~Ka

elronds_daughter 03-06-2005 04:51 PM

Harry the gatekeeper was regretting his request for X-ray vision...

THE Ka 03-07-2005 01:27 AM

i found this while thinking about breakfast...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...ek/aarotk4.jpg
Faramir thinks to himself: "Why are those orcs rubbing their bellies and licking their lips? Don't they know that breakfast hour ended 20 minutes ago?"

Enjoy... I know you all will.

~Ka


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