Sam always accidentaly spilled Rogain on his feet when he put in on his head (he had a receding hairline and bald spot).

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Why did the Gaffer call Sam names?

Sam had a split personality, so in order for the Gaffer to make Sam pay attention, he had to call Sam 3-4 different names until Sam reacted, depending on which character he wanted to be that day.

Why does Sauron live in Mordor?

He's actually a representative of the USGS (United Staes Geological Survey) he was sent there to see about the strange volcanic activity there. He found that he could make really cool little rings in the local volcano and decided to retire in the jolly ole land or Mordor cause it was such a nice place.....

o right... a question

Why did frodo like mushrooms soooo much?

They made him high, he saw many pretty colours.

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Why is Gandalf called Gandalf the Grey?

Well, he wanted to be called Gandalf the Great, but always got interupted while introducing himself and only ever got as far as "Hi, I'm Gandalf the Grea". People thought he was saying, "Hi, I'm Gandalf the Grey" and the name stuck.

What is special about the horn of Boromir?

Boromir keeps it a secret, but it is great for making cream with. You just have to remember to wash it properly, or it is very hard to make a tune on it if it still has cream on the inside.

Why does Gimli dislike elves?

The Ent-wifes got kinda bored in the Fangorn-forest, so they went to The Lonely Mountain, because they had heard, that there would be an opportunity to watch the World Championship in Orc-creation on tv. Unfortunately, they couldn't get to the tv, because the room was already filled with green cheese-eaters...

How did Gollum get the Ring?

Gollum was very good at rifle shooting, and one day at a fair, he saw the ring as a first prize in the shooting tent. He won, and was so thrilled that he decided always to be near it.

Why is Galadriel so fond of water?

Since Celeborn can't swim, Galadriel needs to be somewhere near the water in case he falls in, so she can save him.
Who is Merry?

Merry was the inkeeper of the Prancing Pony. He hated humans and denied them acces to his inn. In the end, King Elessar executed him as a warning to all non-humans.

How did Sam become the Mayor?

The voting rules of the Shire are much like those in America, where the person with the least votes wins. Sam didn't find it hard to get the least votes, as he'd been rather grouchy since Frodo left. He won with the lowest ever total of 5 votes.

What did Pippin do after the War of the Ring?

Pippin, always busy, wanted the job as a mayor instead of Sam. So he began to annoy everyone until he felt so sure that everyone hated him. Unfortunately, the hobbits hired an assasin and got rid of him before the election because they hated him so much. To bad, Pippin.

What did Saruman do before the War of the Ring?

Before the war of the ring, Saruman was a door to door insurance sales man. He also sold dusters and double glazing and occasionaly delivered pizzas to make a little extra money. After the war, he diversified and began selling rings of power as souvenirs of the scenic holiday village of Mordor.

What was Leglolas's skill?

Legolas was an expert at boring people. Whenever necessary, he would talk to someone until they fell alseep. This was great at getting past guards and other unwanted persons.

Why does Sauron like rings?

Well, Sauron has an octopus somewhere in his ancestry and as a result, has lots of fingers! In order to distinguish between his different hands, he wears different rings on each hand, so one has blue rings, one red and so on.

Why do hobbits like beer?

The first hobbits were in adesert, and nearly dying of thirst. Then they found a deserted inn, and survived by drinking all the beer inside. Now they celebrate this day by drinking at least one barrel of beer per family.

Why does Boromir use such big boots?

Boromir is a talented tap dancer, and has to have big boots in order to make the best tapping noise.

What did Arwen do after Aragorn did?

Arwen became a disco dancer, since it was her wishdream. Unfortunately she broke her ancle soon after and died of grief.

Why is the bow Legolas' favorite weapon?

Many people think that the bow and arrows was Legolas's favourite weapon, but actually, it was the bow and ribbon. He could tie a bow faster than anyone who had ever walked in ME and could lasoo orcs with them easily.

What happened to Celebrian?

She was Rivendell's best tap dancer until Arwen took her place. Celebrian became so sad, that she left Rivendell and swore to become the queen of tap dance. She is still looking for a partner, so if you tap dance, she is ready!!

Why does dwarves live in caves?

A long time ago, the dwarves came across a magician who asked them (very politely) to do a few things for him since he was so tired. The dwarves refused, making the magician very angry. He put a spell on all of them that made ugly boils spring up all over their faces, making the dwarves cry at their ugliness. Ever since then, the dwarves have hidden in caves and only come out if they absolutely have to.
Whatever happened to Elrond?

After the war of the ring, Elrond went into pipeweed business. He bought some hobbit farms, and ended up owning the Shire. Now, he lives on his ranch in northern Eriador, enjoying his retirement.

Why did Boromir want the Ring?

Boromir wanted the ring because he was broke. His father cast him out of the house and threatened Boromir to never come back again. Put him out on the streets you could say. Boromir had to get the ring because it was up for bids so high on e-bay, and Boromir really needed the money.

Why did Aragorn marry Arwen?

[ May 19, 2002: Message edited by: Lothiriel Silmarien ]

Hope I'm welcome here, I have to go to the first page and see if there are any rules. I don't want to be interrupting. Sorry if I am [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Lothiriel, your perfectly welcome, this thread is kind of different.

Aragorn married Arwen because he loved her and Arwen married Aragorn beacause Aragorn was a rich king and she was greedy.

Who was Saruman?

[ May 20, 2002: Message edited by: Gimli Son Of Gloin ]

Saruman was a pipeweed distributor. He made some money and lived fairly guiet until the pipeweed harvest was destroyed, thus ruining him. Today, he's the king's jester in Minas Tirith.

Who is Wormtongue?

Wormtongue is the blight which caused Saruman's pipeweed business to go under. Because of this, Saruman became a wanderer, forever looking for pipeweed with no Wormtongue on it. So far, no luck.
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What feat was Feanor famous for?

He was the first being in Middle Earth to fly around the world in a hot air balloon.


Who did Sam marry?

*Whom did Sam marry*

Sam married Arwen after shee divorced Aragorn.

What was Bilbo's first real adventure in The Hobbit?

Bilbo's first real adventure was tying the pair of boots that the dwarves insisted that he wear. He tied himself up a couple times before he got the boots laced up properly, as Thorin refused to help him, saying that any burglar worth his weight in mushrooms ought to know how to tie his own shoes. (By the way, Gimli, your picture of the canibalistic smiley face is hilarious!)

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Why do Hobbits eat so much?

By the way, thanks Gimli [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Hobbits eat so much because they were addicted to crack. They have to get off that addiction by eating as much food as they can hoping that it will take their minds off crack.

Why did Sauron want Ar-Pharazon to revolt against the Valar?

[ May 21, 2002: Message edited by: Lothiriel Silmarien ]

Because the Valar owned him money and he needed some people to join his "posse."
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How did Isildur die?

He died when he realized he chopped the wrong ring off of Sauron's hand.
"That ring belonged to my mother! Off with his head!"
You can guess what happened next. . .

How old was Frodo when Bilbo dissapeared?

Frodo was exactly 256, but he tried to hide his age by taking pills. That way he was able to live to go on his own quest.

Why was Morgoth evil?

His mother dropped him on his head as a baby, killing the part of his brain which should have controlled his conscience. As a result, he didn't have one and had no feeling of remorse or ways of telling right from wrong.

How did Feanor get back to Middle Earth?

First he hitched a ride on the Starship Enterprise, pretending to be Q, and then, when he got in orbit of Middle Earth, he decided to practice his swan dive, and landed in an ocean. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

A question... oops!

If Gollum had an answering machine, what would the message sound like?

"We isn't home, my precioussss, but if you leave poor Smeágol your numberses, we will call you back on the nasssty phone in a bitsy. Talk when you hear the wicked, cruel beep. It hurts our ears, it does!"

*beep*

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Why did Gollum live in a cave?

Well, befoe he was living in a cave, he was living with the wolves. He thought they were very nassty, yes cruel, and so he wanted to get back at them. He stole the head wolves' LotR trading card starter pack and sold it on e-bay. The wolf got so mad and he chased Gollum in a cave and Gollum liked the cave so much so he stayed.

How did Finrod Felagund and all the sons of Feanor die? (I had to throw in Finrod, I like him [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] )